by desib77 35 Replies latest jw friends
Hello everyone....I'm new here.
I was raised as a JW until I turned 19 when I decided to stop attending the meetings. I just rathered not think about it for a few years. Now, I'm married and my husband and I are searching. I just don't know how to open my mind up to other options......actually I feel guilty just posting here..... Does anyone have suggestions? How do you learn to be accepting of other ideas?
I'm really struggling with this.....
Hi desi, welcome to the forum...Take some time, maybe even time that you would normally be at meetings and go exploring. Visit other christian churches, a mosque, a temple of any kind...or maybe take a world litterature course, or etc...just put yourself in the position where learning and tollerance go hand in hand. Best of luck along your journey and again, welcome!
Sincerely,
District Overbeer
Welcome and stick around here, you'll find your way to letting go of the past.
and please do not feel guilty.
cj
Welcome! Confusion is very, very normal, because you are leaving a fictional world for the real one and the rules are different. All of us felt that way. I was raised a Jehovah's Witness, got baptised at 9, and left at the tender age of 46. That's a lot of years! I'm 48 now, and I had to go into therapy for a while, because the guilt feelings I had from leaving gave me panic and anxiety attacks. My therapist, who had counseled many ex-JW's, reassured me that I would feel better and would one day feel as though an enormous weight was off my shoulders. She was right! It took about a year, but it is a glorious feeling to have that weight gone.
This forum helped me a lot, and I hope it will help you too.
Nina
What do I believe and why do I believe it?
To get good answers, you need to start with good questions. I suggest you write down some good questions before you go searching for answers. That will make you less vulnerable to accepting just anything people tell you.
Here are some sample questions:
What is love?
What are some concrete examples and demonstrations of love from my own experience?
If there is a God, would He love me more or less than I love my husband?
Is there any evidence from my life experience that God loves me?
Do I need or even want to meet with other like-minded believers?
What external evidences of God's blessing would I look for, when checking out a group of believers? (some people, for instance, visit the sunday school class to see if the children are laughing and playing, just as you would check out a day care)
Oh, and prayer works for me. Though the answers may come months or even years after I ask them.
Welcome to the forum. You are among friends here.
I left when I was just a bit older than you. I attended many different church services and "just listened". There is nothing wrong with questioning and weighing your options. And there is no need for you to share this with the JWs; they will not understand.
There is no need for you to make a snap judgement about this. These things take time. And during this time, make as many friends on the "outside" ( Non JWs) as you can. It is very important to your wellbeing to have a network of support; because if and when you make the "break"; you know that all of the friends you had as a JW will disown you.
Surf this board for some support; there are many here who have been there; done that.
regards, and good luck, Frank
Sounds like you're still struggling with the things that you learned while you were a JW. Being told that it's "the truth" for many years isn't just going to go away by not being exposed to it. You have to be convinced that it isn't the truth, but you have nothing to base this on. I strongly suggestion you do some research and healing before you consider moving on to another faith (if any at all). Take a look at http://www.freeminds.org
By the way, Welcome to the site! You'll get a lot of support here during your healing process.
Welcome!
A great book that helped me a lot is called: The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse.
You can get it at Amazon for less than ten dollars.
Once a JW, specially if you were born into it, you can check out any time you'd like but you can never leave.
This website confirms it. We just can't leave.
DY
Hello and welcome!
It's normal what you're going through. I just joined this board last month and I've been out of the JW's for 13 years. I still felt guilty. I can't believe how long the programming stays with you. I feel better now tho.....once you start reading everyones experiences it sorta makes you know that you're not alone anymore. I hope that happens for you soon. I look forward to your comments.
Strawberryfieldsforever
