Are You ANGRY That You Were Once A JW?

by minimus 27 Replies latest jw friends

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  LyinEyes

  ((((((((((((((((Blondie ))))))))))))))))) you are a doll, and a very strong lady.

  I have had the chance to do the reverse JW witnesses......... I made a post about that the other day. So when the the right opportunity arises I am more than happy to slam the WT , and the local pioneers escpecially , speaking of SisterHoly , I mentioned in that thread.

  But for the typical person who flat out tells me first off they know JW's are crazy, and they tell them to get the hell off of their property, or they go to the door naked to shock them........ I say,,,,,,,well done.....carry on as you are. ( these are the ones I am embarrassed to say I was a JW, I say , yeah I was probably one that you flashed you perv..........lol)

  You know right away when someone is a person who might be easily swayed by the JW 's, ones that are depressed, the ones who are hounded by the pioneers as easy time (wasters), ones who have lost loved ones recently, sick ones. etc.

  It is actually amazing how religion comes up everywhere, at the local bar, the grocery store, the old friend at the Quick Stop. It is almost like why did these opportunities not happen to me as a JW?

  HUMMMMMMMMMMM makes ya wonder huh?
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  outnfree

  I was angry. Very angry. At myself for being STOOPID (I was an adult convert, not a homegrown Witness)! At the WT for its lies. Now, I am not angry at myself anymore. I consider it a part of the process that I passed through on my way out. The stages of grief/loss are Denial--Anger--Bargaining--Depression--Acceptance. I've been through all of them, some more than once, during my exit from the Borg.

  When I realized the extent of the lies about chronology, for example, and the misquotes about science in the Creation book, which could only have been a product of deliberate deceit on the part of the WT hierarchy, then I was so ANGRY I could've spit nails into coffins for the GB and the Writing Dept. members that I would have been happy to have personally hewn from pine trees!

  When the two witness policy for child abuse came to light, and when I heard about one particular elder (whom I had personally met) having lied under oath in a certain court case and it was obvious he was lying to protect the Society even though it meant great emotional harm to the victim who had been a dear friend of his own daughter, and even though it meant a perversion of justice, I was sickened.

  And yes, I am embarrassed. Embarrassed for my naivete, for my willingness to let others systematically take away my self-respect, for abdicating personal responsibility for many decisions in my life, for believing I was violating God's standards instead of recognizing just how many of those were WT standards... I could go on, but you here know of what I speak.

  So I accept responsibility for being stupid, but I am not going to beat myself up about it any more. Rather, the best revenge is living well. And I think I'm well on my way to doing that, 3 years out. I figure the light actually WILL get brighter and brighter now.

  outnfree
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  RunningMan

  Sometimes. It's mostly behind me, but it still crops up.

  No matter how far away from it I get, I can still feel the residual of it in my life. The org still tries to pressure me to come back through my mother, my mother in law, and assorted relatives.

  I am angry that I wasted so much time, effort, and money on that stupid publishing company. I am angry that I made decisions, not based on what I thought best, but on what their policy was. I am angry that their mind-set will continue to affect my children (although to a lesser extent than me). I am angry that they wouldn't hesitate to kill me (if I needed a blood transfusion) for their idiotic doctrinal mistakes. I am angry that I have been forbidden to participate in the culture and society of my time (holidays, school sports, etc).

  But, most of all, like Lyin, I am embarassed. I have always thought of myself as a smart person, yet for many years I thoroughly believed in poorly thought-out numerology. I am embarassed that I once knocked on people's doors, trying to convince them that the world is coming to an end.
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  Nosferatu

  The only thing is I'm not angry that I was a JW since I couldn't really do anything about the situation I was put in. It wasn't my decision to join, therefore I cannot be angry. However, I'm angry about how the JW religion affected my life. Basically what yxl1said. I used to be embarrassed to admit I once was a JW. Not anymore. I have no problem saying, "yeah, I was a JW once. What a f**ked up religion!"
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  Country Girl

  Damn straight I'm angry to a degree. Mostly I've gotten over it, but the remaining anger is because of my family members left in it, and its continued hold on them. They are very bright people, and the fact that it's as plain as the nose on my face that it's fulla hooey, and they can't, or won't, see it, just baffles and frustrates me! I get angry when I think about it too much: the lost opportunities, the resulting pain of recovery, the slap-in-the-face realizations... but that grows dimmer with time. I just continue to be angry that it holds my relatives' minds tight like an iron bear-trap.

  CG

  P.S. Excuse the French
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  Mulan

  Sometimes, yes. A few years ago, I was BLAZING angry but I passed through that stage.

  I agree with the other posters..............mostly I am just embarrassed that I ever believed any of it. My excuse is being raised in it................slow brain washing.

  My brother, on the other hand, who is six years older than I am, is still very angry and directs a lot of the anger at our parents for doing it to us. I hope one day he will get over it since he has been out since 1977, almost 20 years more than we have. He is carrying his anger way too far. (in his defense, he lost his wife due to "no blood" rules)
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  minimus

  I'm not angry because I was a Witness. I guess I made the best out of it. When I see those that have deep seated anger and it's gone on for decades, I'm sad for them. It doesn't have to be this way. There's a time for everything---including, HEALING.
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  simplesally

  I am not angry, but I am sad. I see so much of my life WASTED. I made so many decisions based on a false promise. I married poorly. I am 40 and should have been 30 having my baby and a house. At least my whole life was not wasted, just 12 years.
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  czarofmischief

  Well, I didn't lose as much as some of these posters did. Pinhugs to all.

  So I'm not too pissed, really. I am resolved to not ever let anyone have that kind of power over me again.

  Death to tyrants!

  And I guess I learned enough, through exposure to the Bible, about spirituality and God, that helps me get through. But I am a lot happier now that I don't have the WT in my face anymore.

  I saw a watchtower in the bucks where I work and I nearly threw up.

  CZAR
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  Sassy

  I'm not angry for the most part. I am angry that because I was baptized, that now that I chose not to be, that I am cut off from people who love me.

  I'm sad that I missed out on things like the prom and birthdays and casual dating before being forced into serious for marriage only dating where a baby comes right along the way. I was only 19 when my first child was born.. I was a baby myself. I should have been going to college, building a career, dating for fun...