On the same idea as JHVH VS THOR.. Bible, Comics, Hollywood Matchup

by gitasatsangha 10 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • gitasatsangha
    gitasatsangha

    Then there is the always difficult matcup between Superman, Silver Surfer, Neo, and Jehovah.

    Strengths:

    Superman: Really strong, really fast, loyal, x-ray vision, heat-beam vision.

    Jehovah: Invisible, Immortal, Irradiates Faces, Can destroy entire cities (Superman can also do this, but wouldn't of course), supposedly omnipotent and omniscient. Can create universes, though who exactly created HIM has never been quite worked out. Cult following. Has an an angelic army at his disposal, and has used it to support Israel in several mideast conflicts.

    Silver Surfer: Really fast (possibly faster then Superman), really strong, can change people's thoughts, has the power cosmic.

    Neo: The ONE. Can alter reallity within the Matrix. Able to alter the very framework of the Matrix itself.

    Archenemies

    Superman: Lex Luthor, Brainiac

    Jehovah: Satan, Baal, Pharoah Rameses III, Canaanites

    Silver Surfer: Galactus, Mephisto

    Neo: Agent Smith, the Architect

    Weaknesses:

    Superman: Kryptonite, Weakness for Lois Lane, dated outfit, only has his super powers in planets orbitting a yellow sun.

    Jehovah: Slow responce time->Took thousands of years to kick Satan out of heaven. Showoff->Used ten plagues to defeat a bronze age despot in Egypt. Is less popular then his son. His edicts are widely ignored. Hasn't really done anything of note in a long time. Tends to delegate to angels and humans. Has anger management problems.

    Silver Surfer: doesn't really have any. Possibly not as strong as Superman. His power is the cosmos, which Jehovah apparently made.

    Neo: Blind in human form. Somewhat weak in human form. USB cables all over his body in human form. Only has limitations in Matrix form which he believes he has, otherwise is constrained by processing power, ethics and available RAM.

    How will it play out?

  • Phantom Stranger
    Phantom Stranger

    Not sure of the ending, but I bet it's a trilogy.

  • FirstInLine
    FirstInLine

    I just hope they dont start spitting out special editions that ruin some really great scenes (GREEDO SHOOTS FIRST!!!?!??!?!??!?!?!? WHAT THE F*** IS THAT S***??!?!??!?!) or prequels that have really shitty dialogue, no substance to the characters, and a director who has lost his F***ING mind.

  • gitasatsangha
    gitasatsangha
    GREEDO SHOOTS FIRST!!!?!??!?!??!?!?!? WHAT THE F*** IS THAT S***??!?!??!?!)

    I laughed out loud when I read that. Lucas is such a wimp nowadays.

  • frankiespeakin
    frankiespeakin

    I like this under the heading of weaknesses:

    Jehovah: Slow responce time->Took thousands of years to kick Satan out of heaven. Showoff->Used ten plagues to defeat a bronze age despot in Egypt. Is less popular then his son. His edicts are widely ignored. Hasn't really done anything of note in a long time. Tends to delegate to angels and humans. Has anger management problems.

    I think some serious cartoons using the the recent computor technology would make millions on these themes.

  • Simon
    Simon

    Maybe we should make a Top Trumps card set ... dubbies vs 'postates

  • Simon
    Simon

    BTW: Silver Surfer is best out of the list. Superman is pants because he's DC. Marvel universe is best !

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    You need at least one of the Xmen in there..

    (Yes... Marvel is best)

  • gitasatsangha
    gitasatsangha

    SImon, I agree. This is how I see it going down.

    Neo is dead immediately. Superman will get a few good hits on Silver Surfer, then Silver Surfer will use the Power Cosmic to turn the sun red for awhile while he does away with superman. Jehovah will not show up and be disqualified. His fans will denouce the whole thing.

  • Simon
    Simon

    What about teams? Can we have a late match-up of the Avengers vs Jehovah? I reckon even the West-Coast Avengers could take him out without too much difficulty.

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