Ros,
That was spot on (a term I learned from Simon's writing.) People, in general, don't like to be preached to, and former JWs find it especially offensive, I think. They want to find their own way in their own time, and do not want anything pushed at them ever again.
The Christians I like are ones who might mention what they are doing, but don't push anything on me. I will give two examples. One friend of mine is a retired financial officer from a hospital. He serves on the budget committee at his local United Methodist Church. He will tell me about what he is doing and his churches' challenges. Not once has he preached to me. Another friend of mine is Catholic. His daughter is a good singer and sings on occassion at his Catholic Church. He has asked me to come hear her sing. He has never preached to me either.
I have my own beliefs and values. I do not try to convert anyone to my way of thinking. If someone asks, I will tell them, but I never express them otherwise. Ros, that is one thing I like about BRCI. It is a support group that has core values, but it does not push dotrine.