So you think you know everything?????????????????

by Tatiana 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • Tatiana
    Tatiana

    A dime has 118 ridges around the edge. (and it's still worth a pennie)

    A cat has 32 muscles in each ear. (and they use none of them..they never listen)

    A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue. (this is a good thing..he can't lick you to death)

    A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours. (which in Jehovah's eyes is a split second)

    A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds. (which in Jehovah's eyes is a nanosecond)

    A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second. (which in Jehovah's eyes is....f**k...whatever!!!!!)

    A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes. (when he blinks with both eyes your ass is in big trouble!!)

    A snail can sleep for three years. (which in Jehovah's eyes....)

    Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer. (and penicillin dealer)

    All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.

    Almonds are a member of the peach family.

    An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (and it's penis is bigger than its....)

    Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child
    reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

    Butterflies taste with their feet. (odoreaters anyone?)

    Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds. Dogs only have about 10. (they don't use these either)

    "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt"

    February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full
    moon.

    In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated. (WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Men have been domesticated.....uh oh...I'm in trouble now!)

    If the population of Chinawalked past you, in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction. (so stop copulating already!!)

    If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red lights. (which is why I always run red lights)

    It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. (it is impossible to fart with your mouth open)

    Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors. (who invented Band-Aids?)

    Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.

    No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

    On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag. )ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha) oh..sorry.....

    Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing. (thank the gods certain male members don't stop growing)

    Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite. (from now on...no peanuts are served on any flights to anywhere)

    Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated. (my frig is now packed with rubber bands)

    "Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and
    "lollipop" with your right. (and they will smack your ass with a lollipop if you have peanuts)

    The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing. (and the average male's left hand does most of the....)

    The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel
    that it burns.

    The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

    The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Fallsfroze completely solid.

    The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are
    read left to right or right to left (palindromes).

    There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar. (and they are all worth a nickel)

    There are more chickens than people in the world. (chickens are now allowed to vote...for Bush)

    There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous

    There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in
    order: "abstemious" and "facetious."

    There's no Betty Rubble in the Flintstones Chewables Vitamins. (whore....)

    Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur. (wonder if Roy knew this?)

    TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

    Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance. (DCFS anyone?)

    Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

    Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest itself. (beer helps the process)

    ....................Now you know everything!
  • got my forty homey?
    got my forty homey?

    What a bunch of useless information Baby!

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow
    The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Fallsfroze completely solid.

    Maybe that is why mom was such a mean old bag? Ah, I love her anyway. Even if she is just ashes sprinkled somewhere in NM these days.

    Tatiana, I loved your commentary even more than the trivia. Very entertaining.

    Flyin'

  • Tatiana
    Tatiana

    Hey..you might need to know this when you appear on Jeopardy, baby!!!!! doh

  • dustyb
    dustyb
    TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

    only on QWERTY keyboards ;)

  • new light
    new light
    TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

    Do you think the inventor of the typewriter did that on purpose? Like, wowwww, mannnn.

  • Maverick
    Maverick

    Great stuff, thought I knew most of it.

    I always love how the government would try to confuse the public by mixing up millions, billions and trillions. A million pennies stacked flat,( as in a penny roll) would be a mile high. A billion pennies would be a thousand miles high. And a trillion pennies would reach to moon and back...twice!

    If the average person took one step for every nano-second he/she could walk around the earth...seven times in one second!

    If you gave a woman a credit card and told her to spend $33 a second, know how long it would take her to spend one trillion dollars? About one thousand years...talk about extended credit!

    Also it is hard for people to comprehend the distances of outer space. If the distance from the Earth to the Sun was one inch ( takes sunlight eight minutes to reach the Earth), the distance to Jupiter would be about ten and a half inches,( eighty three light minutes). On that scale the next nearest Star is over four miles! Maverick

  • got my forty homey?
    got my forty homey?

    GoD! You sound like that pot smoking Carl Sagan creep!

    Jeeeez!

  • abbagail
    abbagail

    Great stuff! Thanks for the laugh, AND helping me to 'learn something new every day' (such as that bit about babies and kneecaps, lol, what do they crawl on between 2-6 years of age? ;-) Pre-nubs? :-D

    Grits

  • Stefanie
    Stefanie
    Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

    I probably roll my eyes as much.

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