I'm having alot of anxiety over what to say when local sisters call on me. When you all were just getting out, how did you handle the unexpected visits? Kibi
Responding to Those Who Call
by kibizzle 13 Replies latest jw experiences
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Elsewhere
You don't have to answer them if you don't want to.
If they ask something you don't want to answer, just say: I'm sorry, but I'm not comfortable discussing that right now."
Keep saying that line over and over until they get tired and leave.
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New Castles
I hate those visits. I just sit there and make small talk as nice as possible while avoiding the big subjects. A family member came by the other night and began counseling me while talking to my daughter (she is only 4 mos old). She kept telling her how important it was to go to the meetings and study...c'mon. Even my wife didnt like it. Needless to say they left shortly afterwards, we weren't very amicable after that.
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Sabine
I've been out for four years, and fortunately they don't call at our home very often anymore. But when I run into them and they come up and ask how I'm doing, I find it really irritates them when I gush on and on about how great we are all doing.
Remember, they think once you leave your life will go downhill fast. When they see how much better we look physically (both my husband and I lost a lot of weight), how happy I am going to college, all the new things I'm learning about, all the recent trips we have taken, they get anxious to end the conversation fast...I love it!!!
When doing the slow fade away, I found it best to stay away from doctrinal topics, let them know you are very happy and that they don't need to be "concerned" about you. Hang in there, it takes time for the anxious feels to go away, don't let them intimidate you.
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lisavegas420
Hi, kibizzle,
Welcome neighbor....... where in Ohio do you live?
When the sisters come to my house I serve cookies and tea. I also refuse to do anything I don't want to do.
Lisa
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Mulan
They have only been here 2 or 3 times in 7 years, but we talk to them. Sisters have not called, only elders and the CO, and all of those visits have been in the last year and a half. We answer their questions, but not in detail the way they would like. I usually reply with a question back, like "Why do you want to know that?" If they say they were just curious, I say I prefer to keep that to myself.
If I run into someone in the store, which is rare, I do the same thing Sabine does. I go on and on about my kids, new grandchildren they don't know about, and all our traveling. They never ask if we go to another cong., or anything. I think they are too chicken.
Princess and I live very near each other and we used to always run into dubs at the grocery store and at Costco, the Mall, etc., when we were active. Now, we have wondered if they go to different stores or if they see us first and hide from us, because we so seldom see anyone anymore. Odd, don't you think?
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blondie
Throw on a robe and slippers and answer the door blowing your nose......
Tell them you're sorry, you can't talk now, could they call first next time.
You don't have to talk to them.
Blondie
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garybuss
It took the first curiosity seekers 10 years to call on me so I didn't have any visit anxiety:-) I gave them 10 questions to answer for me and I had to call them after waiting 9 more years to see how they were doing with my questions. They couldn't even remember the questions. I'm not too sure they even remembered me:-)
It was MUCH easier to leave than stay a Witness. -
Insomniac
When they work my neighborhood and call on my door (I don't think they knew I live here) I just say hi, and if they try to talk scripture, I thank them warmly and tell them I am so busy at the moment, I just can't talk. Even if I was just busy painting my toenails, that's my own business. They get bored and stop dropping by before too long.
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kibizzle
About an hour north of Columbus. Although I'm originally from Northeastern Michigan near the Mackinac Bridge. How 'bout you Lisa? Kibi