My JW friend was telling me the other day how many of her fellow JW's lie on their time reports...I jokingly said "Doesn't everyone?"..to which she replied...probably. There were myriads of ways that are universal, but what about the unique ways in which you reached your goal? Me, I wasn't very unique, I just lied.
Adventures in counting time...or how to waste the entire day in service...
by TresHappy 16 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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Stefanie
I would place a tract before and after a 2 hour buffet lunch.
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blondie
I knew a pioneer brother who handed out tracts while he was on the ski lift and during those apres ski moments.
Blondie
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Atilla
Rounding off is very effective. Also, it wouldn't really make sense to get return visits that are right beside each other. Instead, you should get one and then drive the whole way to the other end of the county for another one even though you know they aren't home and you also have their telephone number as well.
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RunningMan
Lucky for you, I have already compiled the comprehensive list:
The JW?s Time Wasting Guide to Field Service
Techniques for maximizing your field service numbers
while minimizing unpleasantness
The door rub - Many times, a Witness will avoid ringing the doorbell, for the ostensible reason of not disturbing persons who may be sleeping. A knock is preferable - the softer the better. Some timid persons will actually pretend to knock, while not making a sound. This serves the triple role of preventing actual contact with the person inside, preserving the call as a not-at-home, which can be worked later, and counting time.
The early call - A favorite technique is for a Witness to stop and make a door to door call, even just a not-at-home, while on their way to their meeting for field service. This allows them to start the meter, drive for a while, go to a short meeting, drive for a while longer, and then begin work, with the meter running all the while. Making that one early call can easily add an extra hour of countable time for every person in the car group.
The service pace - If you have ever observed Jehovah?s Witnesses in their door to door work, you may notice that they seem to walk very slowly. Quite often you will see them just sitting in their cars or standing on street corners in small groups. This is called the ?service pace?. In normal life, these people move at the same speed as everyone else, but while the meter is running, they look like they are walking up their wedding aisle.
The coffee break - In every morning of service, there must come a donut. Witnesses are allowed to take a coffee break of 15 minutes, while still counting time. So, they usually choose a coffee shop that is as far as possible from where they are working. After all, travel time counts, too. If you ever see a large group of persons wearing suits from the 1940?s and having coffee on a Saturday morning, you can be sure that they are Witnesses. When the world ends and JW?s take over, the world will be devoid of educated professionals, but, by God, there will be jolly good lunches.
The public lunch - Closely related to "the coffee break", the public lunch affords yet another opportunity to count time while satisfying bodily functions. Here is how it works: A group of Witnesses goes for lunch. While eating, one of them places a magazine on the table in plain view of passers by. This constitutes "giving a Witness", thereby enabling the time meter to continue running. In many ways, it is similar to "the wooden Indian" (see below). Some persons have attempted to put a Watchtower in the back window of their car, and count time whenever they drive, but that's just silly.
The literature tip - A commonly used technique during Watchtower conventions is "the literature tip". Occasionally, when JW's are attending a convention or other function, a group of them will eat in a restaurant together. And, when you get this much brain power in one place, it is only a matter of time before someone will come up with the idea of leaving a book or a pair of magazines for the waitress, instead of a tip. Their reasoning is: The message of eternal life is far more valuable than money. This has given rise to a proverb of the food industry: "When Jehovah's Witnesses come to town, they bring the ten commandments and a ten dollar bill - and they don't break either one."
The not-at-home shuffle - Once a territory has been worked, the Witnesses must return to call on the not-at-homes. This takes more time than regular territory, because the calls are spaced wider apart. Often, territories will have only a few calls left. So, large amounts of time are spent driving between calls and territories. Many times, lazy Witnesses will specifically design their day to maximize travel time.
The wooden Indian - You have probably seen Witnesses standing on busy streets, holding a small display of Watchtowers and Awakes. In most cases, they will stand completely mute, expecting someone to actually approach them and ask for a magazine. This is called ?street corner work?. It is ideal for those rare Witnesses who are so terrified of human contact that even public degradation is preferable.
The empty house call - Most Jehovah?s Witnesses go from door to door on Saturday or weekday mornings. This is the least likely time to get people at home. Once it has been established that a certain home is always empty at a particular time, you can be assured that that is when the Witnesses will call.
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mineralogist
The best was to travel by bus. Then you always have some time to wait for the next one to pick you up. Worst thing was my aux. pioniering with having a car: the return visits and the territory work was gone but i still needed time for the report!
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undercover
Don't forget the RVs.
Four people in a car(or less). One has an RV on the east side of town.
"Darn. Not at home." "Hey. I got one, but it's on the west side." "That's okay, we'll get it." 30 minutes later, "Darn, said he didn't want em anymore." "What about you? you got any?" "Yea, over on the east side. Sorry I didn't mention it before." "That's okay, we'll get it anyway." 30 minutes later, "Darn, he aint home." "Oh, look. Times up. Gotta go to McDonald's."
Mini-vans were good and bad for service. Good points: Eight people to a van. Work out in the country. You might get two doors for the day. Bad points: Mini-van full of JWs pulls up in a suburban neighborhood. Eight dubs jump out. Looks like a SWAT team jumping out ready for action. "hut-hut-hut-hut-hut-hut" The service leader pointing in all directions as he directs the team to the doors. Dubs breaking up into teams of two attacking, er, calling on, each house within sight. Then, just as quick, they jump back in and speed off (well, as fast as a Caravan can speed anyway) to the next street.
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dottie
leaving a book or a pair of magazines for the waitress, instead of a tip. Their reasoning is: The message of eternal life is far more valuable than money.
Working in the restaurant business for about 10 years this would enrage me!!! But keep in mind that us meager waitresses were never good enough for the actual magazines...they always left the tracts...
And it wasn't always the Witlesses that did this...there was alot of very zealous mormons and born again christians that would do the same...but they weren't as cheap they'd at least leave a tiny little bible instead of a sheet of cheaply printed paper.
I had a witless try to give me a tract one time at the table when they were paying the bill and I told them no thanks and that I was a devout apostate. The look on their face was priceless. I'm sure that they thought that I had served them demon posessed food or something.
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mineralogist
Oh yes, preaching in the states was fun! When i was there we went off from the meeting (4 people) and thought it would be best to use two cars for two groups. This way you would reach more people in FS. But the elder suggested to take one car and we came to know the american way of preaching - just a waste of time but good for the report.