touched by a circuit overseer

in a new york bethel minute

hi im new here... this is my first new post.

first off, ever notice how packed the hall gets when Jesus i meannnnnn the circuit overseer comes to visit? why do people try so hard to impress him? can he get our dead relatives out of purgatory? well i cant say im not at least a bit guilty of that, because i dont go to the meetings anymore, but just so my mom wouldnt murder me, i went on the tuesday and on sunday (i wasnt about to be at a kingdom hall on a friday night when i dont believe) of her last CO visit. PS- i have a trimmed goatie which JW's think is worldly and offensive. even though it's clean and well taken care of.

i dont like people questioning me about my missing all the meetings, so i left early after the tuesday meeting. but sunday i went in my mom's car, so i wasn't able to leave just as soon as i said "amen." my mother intruduced me to the CO's wife and she asked me what grade i was in. i said i was 24 and i didnt attend high school anymore. well the CO had been counting the donations he received, but managed to overhear my age... i wish i could remember exactly what he said, but it was related to the fact that i had this "peach fuzz" on my chin and i must be out of high school cuz im old enough to grow facial hair. but as he was saying his little remark, he reached up (he was still seated) and grabbed my goatie and rubbed it with his fingers. even my father doesn't touch my face. very few men in my life feel comfortable enough with me to touch my face. and i vice versa. but somehow, this "heterosexual" CO found it appropriate to touch my face as if i were a 7 year old boy. or, to that effect, as if he knew me. even my mother was shocked and she said later that she was surprised that i kept my composure during the "assault."

as i mentioned i met his wife and shook her hand, but i had not even been introduced to brother touchy-face. he had a moustache, which is fairly ironic to me.

i hope this story made sense. i was wondering if anyone else has had things like this happen to them... either someone telling them to shave their facial hair, even when it looks good. or someone touching them inappropriately... or anything similar to something that my story described

truly,

the new york bethel minute

tazmanian russel

They like touching..it seems to give them a feeling of being superior to u...Once an elder came up to me and rubbed my sideburns saying" whats this"? He is very overweight so i felt like rubbing his tummy saying "whats this"

joannadandy

Can I touch it?

Er...sorry...that is kinda weird. I never liked the touchy feely JW's. There was one guy at our hall we used to call Handy Andy. Of course, he only touched and hugged women. And the attractive younger ones and teenagers. *shivers*

Jo of the "I love goatees" class

jgnat

I find the amount of touching to be a personal invasion. On the occassions I have visited, my shoulders have been brushed by strangers as they passed by, and a singularly dotty sister stroked my arm and face! I felt like a pet kitten. I warned my hubby that the next hand that got near my face was gonna get bit.

Now, I am a warm and engaging person, and many people in my personal circle get hugged. But I have developed a connection with these people, and I hope they know my affection is sincere. These people at the KH have not even bothered with the most basic of introductions. They know nothing about me! Frankly, I don't think they care a whit about who I am as a person. I am simply another notch on the belt.

My sister says this is a symptom of cults, who do not recognize individual space.

in a new york bethel minute

symptom of cults... makes sense.

just to be clear, i am a very affectionate person and i have no problem hugging people, even other males. but this, i thought was too much

newyork minute

seeitallclearlynow

Hi there in a new york minute, and a big welcome to this forum!

Yes, my son had a similar experience that really upset him.

He has always been very particular about his hair, especially the length. So although he is still being watched oh so closely since he was reinstated in November of 02, (yes, for all this time!) he still sticks to his guns and wears his hair how he likes it. Well, the brothers in general don't really care for this, most of them allow him to be himself; but there is one anal brother on his "committee" who insists that no hair cut is right except something circa-1950's era - so at one meeting, he walks up to my son and just reaches out and presumes to put his hand in my son's hair and starts rearranging it, right in the Kingdom Hall!! My son is 20, not 5 or 6. And by the way, little boys don't like it either.

He was so upset about this insulting behavior that he vented on another elder who is his friend and who happens to be the friend of all the young people - he really understands and cares about young people - so this brother talked to the offending "new" elder. Hardly anyone really likes or respects the brother either. You should hear the sisters talk about him in the car group. Pretty funny.

Well, the "new" elder is just dense, and he means well, so he called and sincerely apologized to my son.

So what I do is always be sure to encourage my son to not shave before a meeting and to keep his sideburns long, etc. I want to be sure he knows he has full support for any resistance he's willing to exert.

ESTEE

Ickkk!!!

Not exactly the same situation here ... Reading your thread just reminded me of something that happened to my son when he was about 17. An elder counselled him not to wear colored shirts to the meetings ... they had to be white! Now ... just where in the Bible does it say that?

ESTEE

cyber-sista

The bros here could only wear solid colors shirts--not designs whatsoever even subtle and in the best of taste--solid and light colored was the rule.

Had one touchy feely elders aways patting me on the back or give you the old coach-like punch in the arm. I don't mind being touched, but this old punch and pat routine felt rather age inappropriate as I am a woman and not a kid. Otherwise, the bros were a pretty stiff bunch.

Nosferatu

Yup, I had that. I had an elder come up to me, squeeze my arm, and tell me that I should be working out more. I found that to be incredibly rude, making a comment like that.

Surfacing

Hey New York! Welcome to the forum....

I've never had the extreme honour of being facially fondelled by an overseer, though I'm sure that the average witness wouldn't wash their face for a week after for fear of losing their giddy euphoria. I know the C.O.s take extreme liberties with their "sheep" however.

My earliest memory of C.O. fanfare happened as a 4 year old, my mother describing to me excitedly the special week of activities coming up. Unfortunately, as a kid, I wasn't familiar with the word "circuit", so I interpreted it as "circus" overseer. Visions of a fun filled week at the circus morphed into the gruesome reality of more and longer meetings in itchy dress clothes. Thanks mom.

touched by a circuit overseer

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