Ozzie's Weekend Poll #90

ozziepost

G'day all,

What a week it's been! Here on JWD deep and meaningful threads have proliferated, the age-old Trinity debate continues to be played out, and heart-rending experiences have been told.

How's it been for you?

Mrs Ozzie and I have been kept busy, Mrs Ozzie had a small operation and it's a case of 'so far, so good'. Not so good for old Ozzie though! The doctor isn't giving me good news about my injured arm and I miss that good arm so much! Oh well, time for a shiraz!

But this weekend is simply gorgeous weather downunder. The skies are blue, the sun shines warmly and it's hard to imagine that there's an evil borg out there, but there is! Just ask dustyb!!! http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/70320/1.ashx

So, what shall we reminisce about this weekend? Yes, it's time to settle back with a cuppa or something stronger and engage in some nostalgia as we poll this question:

If you got a letter from the WTS in your mailbox, would you:

1. Open it first

2. Open it last

3. Drop it in the bin marked "Apostate Literature"

4. Take it to the elders.

5. Ignore it

6. Tear it into tiny pieces

7. Put it in the shredder

8. Frame it!

9. Send it back marked "Return to Sender"

10. Put it with all the other letters on a nail in the loo.

11. Read it thoroughly and compose a thoughtful reply.

12. Other (please detail)

Well, that's it! Not exactly a nostalgia one this weekend, but instead a "what if". So, get your thinking cap on, and tell us what you'd do.

Enjoy.

Cheers, Ozzie

Blessed are the bewildered - for they won't notice!

dustyb

i'd open it and read it...if it was asking me to come back to the congregation, i would go take a hefty poopy and wipe my ass with it....and then feed it to the kitty =D if it was an important letter that i needed, lets say, the congregation telling me they are sorry for all the hurt they've caused me and my g/f, then i'd frame it and say GG I win you lose 1-0

blondie

#9

I read the WT study article every week. That's enough swill.

Blondie

Faraon

dustyb:

i'd open it and read it...if it was asking me to come back to the congregation, i would go take a hefty poopy and wipe my ass with it....and then feed it to the kitty =D

I advise against it. Even though animals eat poop and is not particularly wrong, you could get into trouble for cruelty to animals if you feed them any WT material.

faraon

gumby

1. Open it first
8. Frame it!
11. Read it thoroughly and compose a thoughtful reply.

A letter from one of the largest cults in the world? Oh yea.....I'd frame it!

I would look at every word they wrote, disect it, then respond back and point out to them their errors of the letter they wrote.......then I would write something nasty in the P.S. section such as......." You bastards better pray to Jehovah that you are correct about there not being a burning hellfire".

Gumby

Scully

I'd read it, after all they may be offering to send me money!

If it was an offer to return money, I'd fax an immediate reply confirming that I'd like them to send me money.

If it was a request to return to the congregation because they really do Love? me, or a request for me to send money to them to support their World Wide Education Work?, I'd ROFL for a couple of minutes, then run it through the shredder.... Three Times, For Emphasis?.

If it was to inform me that they consider me An Apostate? and have to DF me, I'd take it to a lawyer and sue them for slander and alienation of affection.

Anything else... shredder, fireplace, garbage bin... the appropriate places for trash.

BTW, I'd advise against wiping your bum with it, you could get a paper cut down there and that ink they use is notoriously noxious.

Love, Scully

exjdub

I Would:

1. Open it first

3. Drop it in the bin marked "Apostate Literature"

6. Tear it into tiny pieces

7. Put it in the shredder

Then I would:

12. Other (please detail) Wipe my A** with it.

Then, and only then, I would:

4. Take it to the elders.

Exjdub

Strawberryfieldsforever

#12 Bring it with me to the brush pile out back, pour a drink, and toast the holy smoke!

boa

1. Open it first

Yes, absolutely - curiosity is one of my better tendencies.

3. Drop it in the bin marked "Apostate Literature"

Since I don't believe this bs fallacy of jws, I don't have such a bin. I DO have a 'TRUTH about the 'truth' bin though - snick.

4. Take it to the elders.

Jeece, nope, sheesh.

5. Ignore it

See 1 above.

6. Tear it into tiny pieces

Depends - if it was absolute horse-shyte, maybe, but I doubt it. Gradual revelation about da troof has led me on a less tramautic exit from the org, depends on the mood.

7. Put it in the shredder

Don't have one, and besides that sounds like too good an end to probably what would be a good laugh.

8. Frame it!

Unlikely, but I do have a binder with all the funny jokes, picture riddles, sayings etc I've collected over the years, so that would seem an appropriate place to put it. Of coure only an appropriate 'postate audience would get it, but what a red-faced, rib-hurting, tear-jerkin' laugh we could have over it!

9. Send it back marked "Return to Sender"

Jeece no, not unless I could somehow hide a copy of Crisis of Consience in the envelope.

10. Put it with all the other letters on a nail in the loo.

Heh heh, sort of a wts crucifixion?

11. Read it thoroughly and compose a thoughtful reply.

I would consider doing this if some anonymity would be possible, since I'm not ready to be df'd da'd (yet). I have too much work to do to 'preaching' to the converted (my family and a few close jw friends)lol

12. Other (please detail)

I've received many letters from the society over the years as a pioneer dub, bethelite etc, and believe I still have all of them. I only thought about them now because of your post - they are all in a file folder somewhere getting brittle. But maybe I'll dig them up and share some of the more interesting (entertaining) contents of them someday.

boa....very finely shredded paper makes great wipe material, kinda tickly though I bet.

ozziepost

boa,

You kept them????????????

Cheers, Ozzie

Ozzie's Weekend Poll #90

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