by PinTail 16 Replies latest forum announcements
I wondered why I was not at ease being a Witness till I learned what a cult is from many sorces, and stopped being so scared from day to day what God will do to me. I am still scared of what he will do to me from being raised a witness, its weird they did not teach a firey hell, but they put the same kind of fear in me. Everytime some national problem comes along I freek, even when I no longer go to them meetings or read the tower.
Shane
its weird they did not teach a firey hell, but they put the same kind of fear in me.
VERY GOOD POINT. I WAS JUST THINKING THE SAME THING WHILE READING THE RECENT "BIG A" THREAD. I'M GLAD YOU'RE EYES HAVE BEEN OPENED. WELCOME SHANE!!!!!
Everytime some national problem comes along I freek, even when I no longer go to them meetings or read the tower.
I think most people who have recently left do freak out at first but it wears off, time heals as they say. Glad you got out of that disgusting movement.
Brummie
I am still scared of what he will do to me from being raised a witness
Don't worry, Pin. This is all they can do to you . . . BOO!
The rest is up to you. Keep educating yourself and you eventually be free of the fear that still remains in you.
Just yesterday I talked to a childhood friend, Jody. She is now 34, has an unbelieving mate and 3 kids. She still remains unbaptized but takes her kids to the meetings to indoctrinate them in the cult. She expressed to me how no matter what, this is still "the truth". What was disturbing to me was how she said that it never goes away, that "the truth" will haunt you until the day you die. I remember that she use to have alot of "visits from demons" in her sleep and it terrorized her so much. Sadly, while she cannot commit to baptism, she is still so parylized by the fear instilled in her since childhood. Talking to her again really effected me and hit so close to home, and I am sad for her.
Best Wishes,
Corvin
the fear thing gets better Shane. the whole processing thing all seems to go through stages...I am at the PISSED OFF AT THE ORG stage right now, but hoping I can get a hold of that one too and gear it in a more positive direction. give yourself time--get some help--stick around--people care.
Lots of Love ( the unconditional type) cybs
Cyber,
The pistoff stage will pass I been thru it,,and this is what I say: "go a head and get really pist,,I mean get totally pistoff,,until you can't get pist off no more,,and then your done with it. You won't do anything bad,,you may worry about doing something bad but I don't think you will. And calm will follow!!!
Best wishes on being pist off,, give it hell!
There is some deprogramming to do. When you feel a fear coming on, stop and trace where it came from. After you have found the source, diffuse it. It takes a while, and as some have said, there are different phases that you go through.
SS ps, just reading a post from a guy w a name like i use here shows that you have overcome, to a point.
Its hard to get the years of being told one thing out of your brain. Im still trying to get over the "satan" thing as ive posted elsewhere. All i can say is research the GOOD about god. For many years i was against god in general. But it wasnt that it was the JW god. Find some real christians and they will share the love with you not the fear and the doom of armageddon should fade. I am not worried about armageddon at all cos i see no basis for it in the bible. Research is seeming to be the key.
Hugs
cuddlepie
Hi PinTail, welcome to the board.
I have been with my partner since the day he was disfellowshipped (for sleeping with me out of wedlock) & it has been amazing how far he has come in only 3 months. When we first met in February, even though he had real doubts about the Borg & was trying to 'fade', he still said that he couldn't imagine celebrating birthdays or Christmas. In March, after he was df'd he still thought there would be an Armageddon & was guilt-ridden every time we went to bed. By April he was still looking to the Bible to justify things or contradict the dubs. In May he had a birthday party for his kids' & can't wait til his first Christmas.
At the moment it is like he is having his 'worldly' teenage years (he took up smoking - I'm not happy about that!, tried some pot & got the 'adult' channel on pay TV!) after all that repression but is also having a hell of a lot more fun!
Looking at it from the outside, all I can say is it takes time but once your mind starts to expand & you question your previous beliefs it seems to be a very rapid awakening. I think that the hard thing is working out how you cope with all the new knowledge that you gain.
Best of luck & keep coming back to JWD because you get great support here.
Cat
I am still scared of what he will do to me from being raised a witness
PinTail, This is easier said than done, but stop fearing what God will do for what you have been and look for what He wants you to be. If you are reading a Bible, look specifically for the love that He has for all. You will find that He really does not ask for much. Wishing you the best. Triple A
