Poll: Anyone thought they sinned against Holy Spirit? Any anxiety or anger?

by SAHS 29 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  SAHS

  Certainly not that I would ever imply that anyone would have sinned against the Holy Spirit, but I was just wondering how may people either think they may have done this, or in the past thought they may have, or if they felt they were ever a victim of that WT scare tactic.

  If so, did you at some point in your life feel anxiety over it? Did you ever feel anger about being misled into thinking you had when you realize now that you really couldn?t have (at least by that time)?

  I?m sure a lot of folks are curious about how this particular ?doctrine? may have ended up shaping people?s lives in a negative, self-defeating manner, especially during childhood and the teenage years.

  ?SAHS
• 

  Doubtfully Yours

  I think I have because I've cussed out God many times over silently and out loud for allowing the constantly worsening world situation; and have also expressed my anger openly when I've found out awful things that have happened to excellent people.

  So, yeah, I'm totally screwed in that respect. I'm a gonner I guess.

  DY
• 

  joannadandy

  No.

  I think I felt the gulit tactics, but never in terms of pissing off some unseen spirit creature that could smite me.
• 

  Carmel

  Hmmm, my hands are growing hair all over them....must be the Holy Spurt is offended...

  carmel of the "I don't really care" class
• 

  Crooked Lumpy Vessel

  I'm kinda new here so here it goes.

  Sometimes the answer is yes and sometimes no. I am right now suffering a very intense emotional insecurity/anxiety.

  I am afraid of everything and I am convinced that I am serving Jehovah because I am afraid to die for all eternity or maybe my child will die. Then I get bold sometimes and I guess talk bad about the society/friends/congregations. I question teachings sometimes or supposedly friends shun me for telling on someone (this list goes on). Then something changes...sombody will say something like "The end is very sooooooooon" I get scared and run back to hall with my tail between my legs and pray (I'm sorry, I'm sorry) and my anxiety is so bad that it feels like needles all runnning through my body to the end of my finger tips and I am in a constant state of half-faintedness. Then I

  Hence, I guess I only serve Jehovah out of fear that he is going to kill me. I am a good person. I dont lie, cheat, steal or commit adultry. I love my child, keep my house clean. But because I miss meetings, dont read the bible regularly and my field service is been nilch for 6 months I feel like I have sinned against God/his Holy Spirit. Then I wonder why God would kill me if I am not a bad person. Then I read that something like I am the slave that buried the coin. And the whole cycle starts all over again.

  Let's just say I am an emotional basket case.
• 

  Markfromcali

  I don't know about sinning against the holy spirit, but at one point when I was living on my own, away from JWs I felt at this particular moment I lost the holy spirit. It was pretty intense.

  Crooked - I would recommend one very simple thing, which is to ask the question do I know this is true? See it carries the sense of inquiring and not so much an aversion like this is bad, or I am bad - which makes you shut off your mind and sends you running in the opposite direction. It's just an honest interest in what is true, but not having to come up with an answer. Even though not knowing the answer may seem like an insecure place to be, it's really not because you don't know that there is anything to be anxious about, if you go deep enough with it. When you get to that point then you can see everything with fresh eyes, and not through the eyes of fear.
• 

  Markfromcali

  Crooked - just in case you think this is far fetched, let me say a couple more things. First of all, you may only get this in brief moments in the beginning, this fresh view being free from the emotional entanglements - that's enough for now. Second, remember what Jesus said about being like a young child, that's what I'm talking about. It's a matter of seeing through the eyes of a child and questioning from a very innocent point of view. In any case, know that you're not alone here - there's a lot of support.
• 

  Markfromcali

  I have to just say one more thing folks - if you ask me what sinning against the Holy Spirit means, I would say it's simply sinning against love. And what would the JW who shun their relative be doing when they reach out to them in love? Isn't there also a little something about lack of natural affection??
• 

  Markfromcali

  <duplicate deleted>
• 

  SAHS

  (((((?Crooked Lumpy Vessel?)))))

  Your user name bespeaks a problem common to so many here, which is lack of self-esteem. I too have suffered from this pretty well my whole life. Although low self-esteem is generally a somewhat common experience, it is most exacerbated by a judgmental, high-control environment, whereby people are often driven to cope by desperate approval-seeking behavior (always trying to please and ?keep up?).

  Just remember that if there is an all-wise Creator whose primary attribute is love, then such love must be far more profound and far-reaching then we often think it could be. IMHO, in the final analysis, when it comes to judgment and merit, the most important criterion must be, not attendance, hours, cleanliness, or rules, but simply love, which supposedly ?never fails.? So, if you?re a reasonably sensitive and loving person, which I get a sense is the case, then I wouldn?t worry because, above all, that has merit with God.

  (((((?Doubtfully Yours?)))))

  Ditto to you too.

  Also, to everyone who is hurting because of grief over perceived worthlessness, I give you what I can?a big, heartfelt hug:

  (((((((((((((((((((())))))))))))))))))))

  I really feel for people who have had such sadness imposed on them. May you find serenity and happiness, because you do deserve it!

  ?SAHS