Renewal of Wedding Vows - What is the JW position?

pratt1

Although I am inactive, my mother is a pioneer and extremely loyal to her faith. Next year she and my father will celebrate 45 years together, and since they only had a small civil wedding, I though it would be nice to give them an anniversary party including renewal of their wedding vows.

I mentioned this to my wife and she thought that she was told that JW's do not believe in this practice. I can't think of any reason why this would be prohibited, so I am addressing this question to the board. Can anyone confirm or deny this rumor?

Also my Dad is an unbeliver although he has been very supportive of my mother's beliefs and supports her pioneer efforts financially. Since they are "unevenly yolked" would this make a difference?

Emma

I can't imagine anything scripturally objectionable, but the org usually comes up with a reason for something they deem worldly. You should hear from those more recently associated. It's an interesting question.

Elsewhere

Not to be offensive... but I find this to be one of the more humorous (and sad) things about JWs. Anytime they go to make a personal decision about something, their first instinct is to run to the bound volumes to research whether it is "OK" for them to do something.

One of the unmistakable signs of someone in a cult.

Oh, and for the record... my PO grandfather and his wife did this. I'm curious what your mother's elders will say, considering they are all part of Jehover's United Organization (TM).

Quietly Patient

I have an aunt, she and her husband who got baptized, but is currently WAY inactive (I always thought he was smarter than he looked ) recently renewed their vows on a cruise, she is definitely heavy in the JW way-I can't get into specifics but she's a lifer for sure, in a way it's like your parent's situation, so if they did it, I would think it's ok, I agree w/ the pp's about the absurdity of even having to worry it's "not" ok...

Nosferatu

Well, maybe you should ask them, "Would Jehovah renew HIS wedding vows? Jehovah never got married, did he? Even though marriage is Jehovah's arrangement, Jehovah didn't tell his followers to renew their wedding vows, did he? Do you really think it would make Jehovah's heart rejoice if you did something that he never outlined in the bible? Wouldn't that bother your bible-trained conscience?

Doubtfully Yours

Up to personal choice.

I've attended a couple of these and have been done quite nicely.

DY

blondie

Personal choice, but the KH cannot be used.

km 1/77 4 Question Box ***

May the Kingdom Hall be used for a "second wedding" ceremony?

In some lands a couple must get married by a representative of the state, such as a judge, at city hall or the courthouse. That applies to Christians, too. But a Christian couple might want to share the happy occasion with their brothers as well as hear a Bible talk on marriage. So they might ask permission to use the Kingdom Hall in order to follow the civil ceremony with a Bible talk. If such does take place at the Kingdom Hall, it is not really the marriage ceremony, for the marriage actually occurred earlier.

But this two-part arrangement is not followed by Jehovah?s Witnesses in the United States. In this country authorized brothers can perform marriages in the Kingdom Hall. So a couple in good standing with the congregation can request permission to get married at the Kingdom Hall if that is what they want. Or they may decide to marry elsewhere, at a home, or a rented facility, or to have a civil ceremony at city hall. If they choose to have their marriage at a home or a rented facility or to have a civil ceremony elsewhere, there is no reason to have something additional at the Kingdom Hall later.

In some churches of Christendom the idea prevails that a couple must have a "religious wedding" in order for their marriage to be acceptable to God. But that is not the case. (Gen. 24:67) So, if two persons who are free to marry get married by a judge or any other authorized marrying agent, then the marriage is valid before God and the Christian congregation. To go through a "religious wedding" months or years later would suggest otherwise. And because once a couple are legally married in the United States their vows are binding, it would not be fitting to use the Kingdom Hall for a "second wedding" to "renew" those vows. In accord with Jesus? counsel, a married couple can let their "Yes" mean "Yes," viewing their vows as still in force before God and men.?Matt. 5:37.

Mulan

When we were active, I know it was not something a "good " JW did. It was considered bad form, and reasoned that "let your yes mean yes and your no mean no". In other words why do it again?

I actually agree and think it is one of the silliest things I've heard of. I see it on a TV show once in awhile, and am actually embarrassed by it. It is so unnecessary. Once you're married, you're married, so why go through the ceremony again?

Poztate

it would not be fitting to use the Kingdom Hall for a "second wedding" to "renew" those vows.

For most Dubs if it is not allowed at the kingdom hall then it must be that jehovah doesn't approve.Rather than think for themselves "GOOD JW'S" will just contine to let New York think for them.

Nathan Natas

Next year she and my father will celebrate 45 years together, and since they only had a small civil wedding, I though it would be nice to give them an anniversary party including renewal of their wedding vows.... Also my Dad is an unbeliver although he has been very supportive of my mother's beliefs and supports her pioneer efforts financially. Since they are "unevenly yolked" would this make a difference?

Since your Dad is an unbeliever, a ceremony like this would not be permitted at a Kingdom Hall.

Since your Mom is a JW, she is forbidden to have the ceremony in a church of Christendom.

So they may be back to Square One, having a civil servant preside with a (hopefully) larger gathering in a non-religious setting like a private home or a rented meeting (not Kingdom) hall.

Oh, and don't forget - that rented hall better not be associated with Christendom either! Maybe they can rent a room at the United Nations?

It may be that your mother could find a kindly elder to provide the ~~Watchtower advertisement~~ ceremony, IF his Bible-Trained? conscience can handle the riptide internal conflict and self-doubt that has been hammered into him.

Some JWs may even object to the idea, claiming that a vow made before the Eternal Jehovah does not need to be renewed, because Christians let their "Yes" mean "Yes," and their "No" mean "No," as Mulan pointed out above.

What WOULD be highly irregular, in my opinion, is if the whole thing came off with no friction from anywhere.

Keep us informed, OK?

Renewal of Wedding Vows - What is the JW position?

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