The day a brother died in my Hall, & the unbelievable events that followed.

by Mr Ben 125 Replies latest jw friends

  • willyloman
    willyloman

    A sister told me about an incident in her congo that really shook her faith. A young man, a pioneer, died one Saturday while working around the house. He apparently had some sort of heart problem that had gone undiagnosed and was lifting furniture and just keeled over. His father, an elder, was away at one of those elder schools the WTS holds every couple of years. He was rushed to the hospital in an ambulance but was DOA. This all happened near the end of the first day of the E school and by the time the cell phones started ringing, all the elders were already heading for home, a 30 minute drive for most of them.

    The next day, Sunday, was the second day of the E meeting. Most of these elders knew the family, including his father and fellow elder. But they all showed up at the assembly site for the E school. Only the grieving father was missing. Because the school was scheduled well in advance, an elder from a nearby circuit (assigned to the school on a different date) was asked to come in and give the public talk. He arrived, not knowing anything about the circumstances. When told by one of the MS's about the congregation's collective shock and grief, the guy launched into his prepared talk without a word about what had happened. The sister said the entire congo was in tears and wanted more than anything to be comforted, but this guy went thru the drill on some doctrinal topic as though nothing had occurred.

    Meanwhile, at the school, the elders settled for a mention of the boy and her family in the opening prayer and then went on with the agenda, which was of course about getting the friends to do more and how to exercise control over the minions. Noticeably absent was the lesson on caring for others and consoling them as needed.

  • desib77
    desib77

    Desi

  • Fleur
    Fleur

    WTF do the elders have to offer in the area of consoling people, anyway??? when i lost my second baby to miscarriage in 2 years and was totally devestated, when the elders FINALLY came to see me at my family's repeated requests, I was told "well, since your baby was miscarried, it has no hope of a future in jehovah's eyes..."

    and my heart was screaming through the pain "how can you believe abortion is murder but my child didn't matter to god?"

    yeah, they are great at consoling.

    so sorry about these sad situations. I can't believe they didn't stop the meeting. dispicable and heartless.

    i too, am so glad to be out.

  • cyber-sista
    cyber-sista

    Ok, memory trigger here.

    A bro in the congo was dying of cancer. His wife was very zealous and know as being rather cold hearted. She cracked the whip hard on her kids. It was circuit assembly time and this man was on his last legs, but the wife insisted that the kids went to the circuit assembly. I saw them before they left being carted off with another family to the assembly. they looked so pale and drawn and wore out from grief and I really felt sorry for them and it didn't feel right to me at all, but I couldn't process it like I do now. I now look at it as emotionally abusive They could have spent these last days with their Dad, but formost they were to be serving the Org. I doubt if they got much out of the assembly. I remember one talk about missing meetings and it "suggested" that even if some are sick in the immediate family the rest of the family should go to the meetings so they can bring home spiritual encouragement to the ailing one. What about staying home to take care of the ailing one? This of course was never the "suggestion."

  • avishai
    avishai

    When my dad was sick, they thought it was his heart, it turned out to be cancer, he would get really weak, so at first, they let him do the watchtower reading sitting down. Then someone complained that it was unseemly. They made him stand up. He fell down twice. It was his last wt reading. He died six mo. later at 33. I hope they feel like shit.

  • Fleur
    Fleur

    ((((((((((((avishai)))))))))))))))) i'm so sorry :(

  • cyber-sista
    cyber-sista

    ((((((((((((((((((Fleur)))))))))))))))))))))))

    I just shed some tears over your post. I am so sorry those things were ever said to you. I am glad you are out too and away from the WT abuse.

    Love you,

    Cybs

  • cyber-sista
    cyber-sista

    (((((((((Avisha))))))))) too

  • Mr Ben
    Mr Ben

    In a strange reversal, a few years later almost an entire JW family from Shipley were wiped out in a car crash, leaving two orphaned children. I went to the funeral and I couldn't get in. Several hundred "worldly" people in the local area read about the tragedy in the local paper and went to the funeral to pay respects, even though they didn't know them. They sure showed us a lesson in humanity, huh?

  • Atilla
    Atilla
    Yet they won't think twice about cancelling a meeting if it snows a little more than usual.

    Maybe up in Canada this is true, but here in PA, they would never cancel the meeting for bad weather. It would almost have to be a state emergency for them to cancel. I remember many times when we would have to drive home so slow because the snow was so bad and we had 4WD.

    Also, the day my best Witness friend died in a car accident was Sunday morning. He had been in a car accident early in the morning and I found out when I got to the KH at 9 that day. Him and his family where a cental part of the Congregation, very strong in the truth. Did they cancel the meeting, not a chance. I later found out that he was still alive at 9 but ended up dying later around 11:00 A.M. I would have gone to the hospital but of course I was at meeting with everyone else. I still feel bad that I didn't go see him instead of staying at the KH. I think they may have canceled meeting had he not been speeding and crashed his car due to his own fault. Under the circumstances, the elders were probably embarrassed that he had been out so late on a Saturday night probably not studying his WT. My best friend did refuse to take blood even though many in the hospital said it would have helped. I did hear some later at the hospital basically say he bled to death. I've talked to his mother and she say's that his injuries were so severe that blood would not have helped him. Somehow I don't buy this explanation, to me she tells herself this so she can live with herself. Regardless though, a blood transfusion may have helped but we will never know now.

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