I dont much care what they do with my body. Put a smile on my face, electoplate me and set me up in the living room, for all I care. Whatever is cheap so the money can mostly go to my kids, and burial is usually not cheap. I've been thinking of donating body to a univeristy. Typically there are far fewer expenses that way, and something good can come of me for a change ;)
Death
by desib77 29 Replies latest jw friends
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candidlynuts
we chose the absolute cheapest funeral and casket for my grandad when he died and it was still over 6000 bux.. (not including headstone)
i think getting buried is a luxury only those with enough money will have a choice about. cremation and an urn is under 1000 bux.
me? i dont worry about it.. i've been told since i was an infant that i could live forever, so its not an issue..
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Dawn
After loosing a couple of close family members I realize that it's really the ones left behind that either need, or don't want, the burial. Some people need a place to go visit loved ones that have passed on (ie: cemetery) - my hubby is one of those. However, my mom was really bothered with burying my dad and wanted him cremated and then scattered at their favorite ocean spot - she said it was too painful to drive by the cemetery and think of him in the ground there. She would rather think of him as being free and where he loved it best.
So - I told my family to dispose of me in the way that makes THEM feel best. If they want me cremated, so be it, and if they want me burried, that's ok to. Just don't spend much $$.
AND...I want my memorial service in the church I now attend. That way only my friends will be there and no JW influence!
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Balsam
Well I have had differing views over the years I've thought about death. I'm 53 years old now. When I was a young person before my exposure to JW I wanted to be cremated, then as a JW I still wanted that and one one ever objected. I hated the thought of being buried in the ground, it creeped me out.
Over the past 10 years, I've had my Mother and Dad to die, they were cremated by their own wishes and share a common head stone and grave. Their ashes are buried there. Then my sister died, she was horrified at the thought of being cremated, but my nephew could afford nothing else for her as she died without insurance. Then my beloved 15 year old son was killed as a result of an auto accident.
This changed everything about how I felt. I had never wanted an open casket for myself before. But I needed an open casket for my son because it was so horrible he being snatched away so suddenly. It also allowed his school friends to grieve for him and experience death for the first time for many of them. There was nearly 150 school children who attended Dak's funeral from his high school. They cried with us all. We had a JW funeral for him which I don't remember hardly at all. After the funeral Dak was cremated, then his ashes were buried a week later next to his grandfather. We had a lovely headstone made of him canoeing down the river. And his web-site ingraved on it: http://www.mem.com/display/biography.asp?ID=9894 Here we could add pictures of his life, the happy times we shared as a family. How proud we were of him.
I know now that loved ones need to be allowed to grief, and that funeral service are not for those who die, but for those who survive. And we need to go through the funeral process to allow that to happen.
I would never deprive my remaining two sons and my wonderful husband and stepfather to my children to not have a normal funeral for me when I pass. They would need the opportunity to say good bye. And I don't care anymore whether I am buried or cremated, I want them to do what ever brings them comfort when my time comes.
Our bodies no longer are who we were when we die, it is an empty shell, and it makes no difference.
Sometimes life teaches us many lessons even beyond what we think we know. I'm no longer a JW and left the witnesses after Dak died. I existed in a mental fog for over a year. I left his father, and he continued on with the JW's and I didn't. Dak's brothers have left the witnesses too, and are much happier.
Balsam aka Ruth
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Double Edge
Balsam (Ruth)...
Your posting really touched me. Life can be really hard at times ... so many questions. Sometimes it's just a matter of putting one foot in front of the other and moving forward, not second-guessing anything. Thanks for your thoughts.
D.E.
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Lady Lee
I think ideas about what happens to us or how we are disposed differ a lot according to culture. Some places it is unthinkable to bury a body in the ground and other places can't imagine cremation. Family background, religious connections and beliefs and traditions have a lot to do with it as well as some of the fears noted above.
I had my father buried. Let the worms get him.
But like the culture I was raised in (JW) I prefer the idea of cremation. Right now I live too far from my family for anyone to want to "visit". Hubby and I both want the cremation so we don't have a conflict there. I still believe when you are dead you are dead. And I won't know what else happens til I get there so I'm not going to worry about it.
Cost is a factor in part but I don't want an open casket - no viewing. My daughters can check just to make sure it is really me. And a brief ceremony when they do whatever with my ashes. Simple and cheap.
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Mulan
Maybe if you give him the cost breakdown, he will change his mind.
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kls
As someone had mentioned about closed or open casket, i would prefer closed. When i had to bury my 3 day old grandson i made sure the casket was closed . When my dad died his casket was open and that is how i remember him and it was horrable. To me it is to painful to see my loved one's lying there and not moving and made up like they are alive.
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truthseeker1
Well, my death means the end of me, so I don't really care what is done to my body after I'm dead. I could be chopped into 1000 pieces, becaue I'll be dead on wouldn't care. BUT that would really horrify my living relatives, so.......Whatever my family wants to do with my corpse is up to them. I'd like to donate whatever organs that I can (my dad donated eyes to someone when He died, I always admired that), but after that I'd leave my remains to my survivors
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maxwell
I want to be cremated. Everything else is up to those still living. If they want to have a funeral with an open or closed casket before they burn me, fine. If they want to throw my ashes to the wind, fine. If they want to put the ashes in the ground with a tombstone, that's fine too. What I don't want is a big expensive casket in the ground with my body taking up space down there. If any of my body parts were good for transplanting or for science, it would be nice to have the useable parts removed before they burn the rest of me.