So i've been trying to slowly fade away, just going to meetings on Sundays, and even then its been hit and miss. I figure the Daniel book is a write off with 607 figuring prominently along with all the "fulfillments" based on it, and since I'm not going out in service, the TMS/SM is a waste of time.
Even Sundays play out like a broken record, the WT study articles show no sign of real change, but a clinging to power and a re-defining of WT history. The Public Talks are sheer fantasy.
The sad thing is, I like the people, and perhaps even the concept is attractive. I've been in bad halls and its a shame to make my exit in one that I like. While I keep a low profile, people have always treated me well, and when some say they've missed me, I do believe they have.
I know they feel bad, because I felt bad when people "disappeared". Even though I've told some elders my concerns and issues in full detail, its as if many refuse to want to accept it. I had to resign formally from the TMS because they kept giving me talks to do.
Funny thing is that a week after the COs visit when I was expecting more heat, because I cut out on the visit and I obviously would have come up at their meetings, a brother asks me to do one of the mics last Sunday.
Not that I considered that some big privelege or anything, but I thought it was strange considering I'm hardly at my meetings and all. I guess he was just ill-informed. I accepted, didn't know what to say otherwise. I figure that would be the last time anyway.
As I made my way toward the exit, as usual an elder seems to be waiting for me. "How's everything Path? We've missed you. It was so nice to see you here today. You know, if there anything I can do..."
"Everything is just fine. Couldn't be much better, really. But thanks for the offer. How are you doing?"
"I'm fine. Its just that people have been asking about you and all."
"That's so nice of them"
"Will we see you again Path?"
"I'll be around"
I realized that one must do what they have to do. Its very difficult when you really can't explain things in full detail to them, and if you could you know they wouldn't believe it or understand what it all means.
In time they too will ask the questions and the time will be right for the answers. Until then I hope they are happy and wish them the best.
Path
Edited by - Pathofthorns on 7 August 2000 21:34:39