Last week, my girlfriend wrote an email that she intended to send to my mom. My JW parents have never spoken to Jessica in the 3 years that we?ve been together (my loooooong story was on the board last week?don?t worry, I refuse to write anymore details than I have to in this post?my fingers are still cramped up?)
Anyway, the email was to be their first (and last, probably) communication. When she told me that night that she had emailed my mom, I was a little upset. In my last contact with my mom, she had forbidden me from emailing her anymore and I intended to respect her decision (mostly because I know they don?t respect mine, and I guess someone has to be bigger, you know?). I felt like jessica?s email would just kind of give them justification for their stand.
Well, I started to think about it, and I?m not so sure I?m right. I think jessica has as much right as anyone else to express her viewpoint towards the religion and the actions/attitudes that come forth from it. turns out the email messed up and my mom never received it. but I told jessica to try to send it again this morning. I gave her the correct email address and encouraged her to send it. my folks haven?t even acknowledged that she exists at all and I know that has to be tough on her (I can?t even begin to put myself in her shoes?).
Her email is great, too. She sent me a copy yesterday. She says (among other things):
"You people are most definitely some of the meanest people I have ever known (of). I do not come to this conclusion from things that Michael has told me (he has been nothing but loving towards you). I come to this conclusion based on what I have experienced Michael go through because of you all. Casting out someone for having a differing opinion is prejudice at its strongest ("You have to think and act as I feel and then I will love you, or if you think differently don't express it."). God loves all of his children of the world unconditionally. You all are not showing God's love because you all love conditionally. That is not true love."
It?s pretty rough stuff, I know. I probably wouldn?t have used those words/phrases, but I think that?s the point. It?s not my perspective; it?s the perspective of a loving girlfriend who is experiencing JWs for the first time and has some strong opinions about it (and rightfully so, in my small opinion). Don?t get me wrong?I don?t think this will change anything, but I want my parents to realize that their actions are affecting people thousands of miles away very negatively. Not a very ?good witness?.
I don?t want to be spiteful or bitter towards my family, or hurt them maliciously?I don?t really think I am, but some things (although possibly painful to hear) do need to be said at least once. Besides, my girlfriend?s email is my girlfriend?s business. It?s between her and my family. Like it or not, they have a relationship with her (if only though association).
Well, that?s what I wanted to say. Thanks for taking the time to read this. If you have any thoughts/suggestions or anything, I?d love to hear them.