CAN IT BE DONE???

by steve_19 16 Replies latest jw friends

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  steve_19

  now i pose the question of 'can u make friends over the internet'?...

  how is it possible to define the relationship of 2 or more people over the internet? how do u really know who the other person is that you are supposedly making a friendship with? and to what level of trust do u display in that person?.

  now i have heard of people getting married and living happily, i know of 2 jehovahs witnesses that met over the internet and r now happily married.. i have had aqquintances over the internet before. but then again all to many times u c that trust has been broken and some people get into very difficult situations with someone they thought thwey new turning out to be a totally different person.

  CAN IT BE DONE?
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  Simon

  I think it can be done but depends on both parties being open and honest.

  The media likes to show the headline grabbing horror-stories of the Internet but there are many many people who make friends on a daily basis.

  We have met many people online that we consider friends. We've been fortunate to be able to meet up with some of them and still look forward to meeting some of the others.
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  roybatty

  I believe I've made some good friends here. Though I've never met them in person, I'd feel very comfortable having them visit if they were in the Chicago-land area. Except for Valis, he'd probably scare my kids and neighbors. LOL! J/K
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  onacruse

  Simon:

  I think it can be done but depends on both parties being open and honest.

  Exactly.

  I've made more friends than I can count, via JWD. In fact, just now got off the phone from a pleasant and downright exhilirating conversation with a bloke that lives in Scotland (is that still a real country???) LOL

  And of course, there's my wife, who I met via JWD.

  In each and every case, it's the combination of honesty in our posts, and honesty/consistency in the personal conversations, that has made these relationships work out.

  Craig
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  Princess

  I agree with onacruse. I've literally met dozens of people from JWD (including ona and wife). It can be done and is well worth the effort to meet up with online friends.

  The Scottish bloke hasn't called me though. Bet I know what you were talkin' about.

  Rachel
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  StinkyPantz

  I think it can be done, but then again people define the word 'friend' differently.
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  avengers

  CAN IT BE DONE???

  From what I've seen? Yes.

  Looking forward to meeting more of you.

  Andy
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  xenawarrior

  Yes- it can be done. I've established some very valuable friendships from this and other discussion boards. I've also met some people who I've learned are pretty dysfunctional. I think what is important to remember is that the only way that friendships gained from the internet are going to last is the same way they last if you met those people in the "real" life realm. Relationships require honesty and compassion and working through problems as they arise no matter what realm they were established in.
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  jgnat

  I make a distinction between a virtual friend and a flesh-and-blood one. I give out my personal information - even my hotmail address - to very few people, and as onacruse made clear, my choices have a lot to do with honesty and consistency with their postings.

  I only give out identifying information to people I plan on meeting face to face.

  This has worked very well. I have met Concerned Mama and another poster whom I have forgotten her onscreen name, face to face, and though we both had some misgivings to start, I have gained a true and valuable friend. Though Concerned Mama and I are in the same city, we would never have met without the help of the internet. The internet gave us a head-start in our relationship, as we already knew we had some things in common, and had already shared many of our thoughts and feelings.

  What is weird is talking chat talk in person, and getting used to the person's features and mannerisms. There are things you only learn by being with somebody.

  My internet friends are as real to me as the characters in a book. They are three-dimensional and their motives and behaviors are consistent.
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  bikerchic

  This is the second db I've been on for any length of time and by far one of the common denominators in really getting to know each other is by personally meeting with each other.

  I've gone to gatherings from both boards and have met people from all over the world, literally, and even though I had a pretty good idea about the person before meeting them IRL nothing says it better than actually meeting them!

  Honesty in these situations is a must. I've arranged to meet people on line before and when they continually put me off for one lame reason or another I figured they hadn't been honest about who they were trying to tell me on line they are. Big red flag! I'm glad I didn't pursue it who knows they might have been an axe murder. Just the same I'm put off by those here on JWD who are reluctant to meet with others, I have to really question just who they are.

  It's really best to met people that you know from within the community others have met them and know they are genuine like many of us here on JWD have. It makes it less scary for sure and you can really met some wonderful people after all many of us have left our JW friends behind and are starting all over again, what better people to meet than those who totally understand what you've gone through.

  In all my communication with ona before we met I knew exactly what to expect and wasn't disappointed one bit, in fact I was pleasantly surprised!

  So yes it can be done, caution is the key word.

  Kate