I know this is a long shot but here goes a radical idea.
What if Bonnie Balko was a real manipulator and she married her husband but was in an arrangement like CTR and Maria. And what if Bonnie just used her husband,,and the afair with his wife by JR was tollerated because their were benifits for bonnies husband as well. Bonnie may have always tried to please the Judge because that gave her power,,she may have even been willing to share him with her freind(Bertha) because that would always be an ally,,she could use to manipulate the Judge.