Hi, My name is Arnie and I am a Christian pastor. I truly feel your pain. I over the years have tried to minister to a number of WTBTS in active field service and inactive. I, not knowing exactly why, have done so with tears in my eyes. I wondered both at their sincerity and their passion, however the level of deception under which they ministered was frightening. The more I have researched and listened to the testimony of ex-Jw's the more I realize that I have a great love for these people. Some accused me of hating JW's, but that was far from the case. I only hope that your and other ex-JW's experiences with the WTBTS religion has not turned you away comletely from the True God. If it has then the true agenda of the "god" of this world has suceeded. The God is a God of love. I only hope as you journey in the waters of freedom that you encounter the Jesus of Nazareth. His unconditional love is matchless. It is not my intention to preach to you but only to share in your pain and wish you well. I was raised in a religious home and I almost entered the WTBTS religion. I read the Truth that leads..., Evolution... I became well versed in WTBTS language (prior to the "new light"), but I refused to give up my independent thinking. I also planned to get a college education. So that (Thank God) kept me out. I kept studying the Scriptures and apologetics. I subsequently challenged many JW's. Often I was told I'd make a good JW. I am so sorry for the pain you went thru and still feel as a result of following this religion. Please know that it was not God's doing nor His work, rather it was the work of men. I only hope and pray that I as a Christian pastor will be faithful to Jesus of Nazareth and to His people. Please feel my heart beat not my words alone. In His Love, Arnie