In my teens I couldn't see myself as not being a JW for the rest of my life, even though I began to question some of the doctrine and wasn't getting intelligent reasonable answers from my parents.
During this time our cong. split and "I" was left behind. All my friends got moved to the new hall, the new congregation, but my dad, being the elder he was, was asked to stay with the old cong. because of lack of leadership within the new boudaries.
When I moved to another city (12 miles away from home) to my new husbands congregation, I saw and heard things right away that just weren't right (before we got married). The congregation I was raised in was honest supportive joyous and loving compared to the one I moved to - married into.
I asked my dad about the things I was seeing, and he confirmed that "they" were way out of line, but there was nothing he could do about it. I discussed it with the circuit overseer, but he said he couldn't "see" it as he knew these elders for years (so did I, I grew up with their kids), and since I was the only one with "issues" maybe I was incorrect.
I checked out a few others in the area and found more or less the same haughty, hypocritical attitudes. Wwithin a year I couldn't see myself remaining a JW. Without realizing it, I had begun to fade. Mostly because I just couldn't stand to attend and subject myself to the BS.
Hugs
brenda