Job

by kwintestal 22 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

• 

  LittleToe

  I'm not saying that pigs trotters aren't a delicacy (though I confess that I have no desire to ingest them) but I do agree that if Shem had been around when "Moses" wrote those laws, maybe the world would have been a happier place!

  I mean, you'd no longer have to bring home the bacon, you'd have it all on a plate.
  You'd no longer have to eat like a pig, smell like a pig, or be called a pig over an attitude.
  Stubbornness could be wiped out in an instant, if folks weren't pigheaded, and surely it's the interactibility of stubbornness that causes many wars?

  Therefore I would argue that the world would have been a different place, had it not been for Job.
  Maybe karma is a reality, after all...
• 

  Will Power

  How was Job God's friend if there is only "one faith" that more then likely Job was no part of?

  The only reason you ask this is because it was what you were taught by people who want you to believe that, just to keep you in line.

  have you read orwell? A question like that is very good if you want to be seen as a trouble maker.

  or in my case evil, stubborn, unkind, mean, heathen, satan's helper, close minded, hmmmmm, what else was I called this morning? what else was implied?

  hmmm (marge's voice)
• 

  LittleToe

  WP:Ah, you get those, do you?
  Before we separated I used to be told I was "inspired by the devil" and in Satan's service.
  My heart goes out to you...
• 

  Princess

  She was called Mary, and had a little lamb of her own.

  Hmm, interesting coincidence as his first wife was also called Mary. You might have heard of her, they say she was a contrary b*tch. Rumor has it after Job dumped her she took up with a pig farmer and started smoking Marlboros....can't remember the dude's name.
• 

  LittleToe

  Wow, I heard thta rumour, too. It must be true then.
  Did you hear about his delinquent grandson called Pe.leg?
  I heard he p*ssed himself climbing that big tower great-uncle Nimrod was building.
  Never let a child on a construction site, I said, but would he listen? Never send a boy to do a man's job!
  Which reminds me, that Job guy. He did some shoddy construction work in his time. I heard it was because he cut corners that his kid's house fell down...
• 

  Princess

  I heard it was because he cut corners that his kid's house fell down...

  That was his first wife's kids from her second husband. A big bad wolf came and he huffed and he puffed....(but he didn't inhale) and he blew the house down...little pigs didn't stand a chance.
• 

  LittleToe

  See, now if only inhaled, it might have gone better.
  All that passive smoking brought about the first smoked bacon, and contributed to the scene I mentioned earlier...
• 

  Princess

  No no no, he didn't inhale because he knew smoking Marlboros was bad for your lung power. He huffed and puffed (huffing destroys way more brain cells BTW) oh never mind. He was a bad wolf and truth be told, he was looking for Mary mary quite contrary 'cause he had a thing for ornery b*tches.

  And regarding Pe.leg, he probably wouldn't have p*ssed himself if he hadn't been huffing with the wolf.
• 

  LittleToe

  I should just add that this is why Job's religion shares a common ancestry with other pig-hating cultures and religions.
  There'll be tears before bedtime...

  (see, I can eventually get on-topic... can't I?)
• 

  Princess

  Oh you'll get bored with it and move back to fluff like the rest of us Ross.