THIS IS ALL COMPLETELY NORMAL???

by Corvin 31 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

  • Wallflower
    Wallflower
    "Foolishness is tied up with the heart of a boy; the rod of discipline is what will remove it far from him." (Prov. 22:15)

    How many times did I hear that at the meeting when I was growing up and shudder.

    I remember once, at about the age of 7 or 8, being taken outside the hall after a Sunday morning meeting to be spanked for some minor thing I'd done, just as everyone was leaving. How embarrassing. The girl I was on kissing terms with at the hall said to me at the following Thursday meeting, "I saw your bottom," and she giggled. I still cringe now. Mentally scarred.

    The time I knew that we were very different from the norm was when my younger sister and I stayed at for my aunties for one night as my parents were called away. I was about 11 or 12. My aunty had 4 boys, my age and younger, a very normal healthy family. Bedtime arrived, we all trooped up to bed. My sister and I slept in the room above the lounge and we could plainly hear the TV. We never had a TV in our house until we were much older. A film was on and we lay in bed listening to the music and the muffled words and became more and more agitated about being in a worldly house, in the dark with no protection from Jehovah, scared of everything. Eventually, I plucked up the courage and went down stairs and implored my aunty and uncle, with tears streaming down my cheeks, "Please can you turn the telly off, we can't sleep because of the demons." They just looked at me stunned.

    Just another normal, healthy, well adjusted JW child. *looks for the sarcastic icon*

  • Preston
    Preston

    Hey guys, your posts have actually opened my eyes as to the real reason why I like S & M so much. Who would of though the big "J" was such a masochist....

  • Corvin
    Corvin

    Hey guys, your posts have actually opened my eyes as to the real reason why I like S & M so much. Who would of though the big "J" was such a masochist....

    lol, preston. This is sort of an important topic.

    Best Regards,

    Corvin

  • Soledad
    Soledad
    I was a little slow on the draw in that regard. It wasn't until I was completely out - having already decided quite clearly that the Witnesses were completely wrong on doctrinal matters (due in no small part to the fact that I discovered I did not believe in the Bible).

    exactly the same thing in my situation

    I would lay awake at night thinking of the ways people had tried to help me to grow, while I was stuck in high-minded elitism, and be profoundly moved by how much love the average non-JW really had.

    that describes me perfectly! I keep thinking in how there was a "turning point" in my life, right before I left the JWs for good, where a professor tried to point out something to me about me which was quite obvious. I didn't quite get it then (really because I was scared to face the truth) but boy did I get it later on!

  • Purza
    Purza

    I was just discussing this with my BF this past Monday. I told him that I first got hit with a belt when I was 6 years old for lying about taking some candy from the living room. I told him that the bible said "do not spare the rod". . . .literally. My BF said. . . "so "they" believe in corporal punishment" and I never really thought about it until he made that comment. I always thought hitting your kids with a wooden spoon or your hand was normal and I never gave it much thought. Now that I have been "deprogrammed" I realize that way of thinking is very ABnormal.

    Purza

  • Odrade
    Odrade

    Wallflower, LOL at your staying at the relatives... I had almost an identical stay when I was about the same age. My brother and I got hysterical, and demanded to be taken back to our parents. They managed to get us calmed down, but we still went home first thing in the morning.

    As far as the other stuff, yeah, I thought it was normal. Didn't even realize how abnormal it was until about a year ago. I looked at the little 3 year old girl I took care of and realized that we used to get hit--with things like sticks, belts, hairbrushes, spatualas--when we were just that little! Well, needless to say, looking at that little, perfectly normal girl, I woke up and knew that it was totally sick and wrong.

    And what's sicker and wrong-er is that my parents (well, my dad anyways) were led to believe that mode of discipline was normal and right. We may never have been beaten children if he hadn't been taught that bullshit was "Jehovah's Direction" as a young parent.

    Gah, gives me a stomach ache just thinking about it.

    O

  • hemp lover
    hemp lover

    (((Iforget))) your story got to me.

    I was very stubborn (imagine that) and at some point it became a battle of wills between myself and my mom. She would start in wailing on me and I would stand there and stare her right in the eyes with my jaw set. I refused to cry and she refused to give up until I did.

    Gretchen, this gave me a deja vu moment. I can remember so many times when we had a "wait till your father gets home" day and after I'd gotten beat, my mom would say, "hit her again, she's not crying." I never cried in front of her. I went to my room and cried, but not from the pain. It just hurt my feelings so bad that my mom wanted to see me cry. She would always make a point to let me know later that she knew I was crying in my room. God, this thread is making me ill.

  • Xandria
    Xandria

    Sherry:

    Our mother and your mother must have been from the same smack your kid class or graduated from the same school of abuse.

    My mother and I did have a battle of wills, too. She would taunt me, ?Go ahead and call Child Abuse! All they will do is put you in a foster home where they will really abuse you!? To my sisters and brother she would shout:? You better stop that crying! OR I?ll really give you something to cry about!? that was a favorite of hers with my younger siblings.

    What was really sad and ironic, is when CPS did finally come. They did not do a damned thing, which made our mother feel more ?empowered? like she was right. It made matters worse for me, each time they did come. The first time they came out, I was sent to school with strangulation bruises around my neck and nail marks (which I still have the scars of) on my arms and neck too. (I fought back, when she was choking me). One of the people who were in a trailer next to our tent trailer heard my sister R scream. ?Mommy STOP you?re killing her!?

    CPS came down to my school (I was in H.S.) and spoke to me. I was very scared and mumbled my replies. All they did was go up to the campground and lecture my mother on proper food care. She was waiting for me when I got off the bus, she accused me of calling them

    It is amazing what can be considered normal.

  • Jankyn
    Jankyn

    I realized it was abuse in therapy in 1998 (38 years old!), when the therapist was shocked by what I was telling her. I honestly believed it was normal until then. I still have difficulty with denial.

    Jankyn

  • Nosferatu
    Nosferatu
    To my sisters and brother she would shout:? You better stop that crying! OR I?ll really give you something to cry about!? that was a favorite of hers with my younger siblings.

    Yeah, I got that one. When I was crying after being hit, I also got, "Shut up or you're gonna get another one!"

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit