20/20 tonight 12/10 9 pm CST: Sexual Abuse in the Amish Community

by blondie 24 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

• 

  blondie

  Just because abuse is in many religious communities does not excuse the WTS. The WTS is the religious community we were involved in, the one that either we and/our our relatives and friends were put at risk by in a "special" way. While saying only they have the "true" God's approval, the WTS has allowed pedophiles to be protected and victims to be further abused. How many times has the WTS said that Christendom is more reprehensible than non-Christian relgiions because of their hypocrisy? From the days of Rutherford till now at least in every WT.

  This case is to show the dynamics in such groups and why the so-called "Christian" personalities and teachings do not protect the children. These groups hide behind the 1st amendment in a way never intended by the framers of the Constitution. The WTS claims clergy privilege while at the same time crowing that they are better than Christendom because they do not have a clergy-laity distinction.

  Yes, the WTS has more to answer from in regard to their handling of abuse in their congregation. Their taking on the name of God's only true representatives puts them front and center.

  Blondie (who has hasn't seen it yet)

  Sorry, I didn't see Dateline advertised but thinks for letting us know we had a choice or even a double dose.

  If the Catholics and JWS (and others) in SNAP and LINKUP and Silentlambs can change the laws in the US in regard to one relgiious group's handling of abuse, it will benefit everyone in every religious group. By putting our efforts, time and money, together, it can be done.
• 

  Will Power

  I caught a bit of the Dateline show. The girl who was abused by her 2 brothers (Oprah had a great definition of abuse yesterday) tried to "tell" about the incest to a state trooper (among others) that happened by. She was desparate to get out. The mother knew that she was trying to "tell" and get help, so one day while they were at the amish dentist, for a toothache, the mother instructed the dentist to remove ALL HER TEETH. She was 16. The mother said "that will make you think twice about talking".

  She is now free, lived in foster, and a court said the family was to have no contact with her. At the trial, it was filled with amish and the judge noted aloud that they all seemed to be there to support the brothers (Amish law put them on restrictions for about 6 weeks) - they had admitted their guilt and were being sentenced. The judge found that disturbing, as anyone would. There was no support for the girl.

  will
• 

  candidlynuts

  both programs were quoting the same legal journal article .. theres a link to the article both at msnbc.com ( click on dateline) and at abcnews.com (click on 20/20)

  i was appalled at the mothers in this story. if nothing else shows that the amish have problems with their religion , the fact that the mothers did nothing to protect their daughters , and even going so far as to BLAME the daughters , shows that theres some BIG problems ! (oppressing women to the point that only men matter)
• 

  Scully

  Sickening similarities between the Amish case and JW cases of sexual abuse that I noticed:

  1. Sexual abuse was treated as a "sin" and not as a crime. The abuser was reprimanded according to the church/community's standards - 6 weeks of shunning - and then the "sin" was 'forgiven and forgotten' by the community, and the victim was expected to do the same.
  2. The victim went to the authorities (outside the community) to report the abuse of another sibling and recounted her own story in so doing. When the trials were underway, the community went to support their men, and openly shed tears for him. The judge reprimanded the Amish in the gallery, asking them if they ever shed any tears for what happened to the victims.
  3. Victims were unable to verbalize what had happened to them initially. They had no sex-ed and could only say the boys were "being bad" to them.
  4. Adults (the mother, in this instance) telling the victims not to talk about the abuse to anyone else.

  One thing that did impress me was the total honesty of the perpetrators and their willingness to give full confessions, not just to the leaders of the Amish community, but to the police and the court system as well. They had no problem entering a guilty plea. I was actually able to feel some compassion for these guys for owning up to what they did to their sisters, and offering a heartfelt apology 'for ruining her life' to the one who brought the matter to the authorities. He also acknowledged the shame he brought to the Amish by raping his sister.

  Now, if only JW molesters could swallow their pride and do the same. I sometimes think that Silentlambs would not exist if only the WTS and JWs who have molested would recognize the damage that they have perpetrated over the years, admit they have been wrong and apologize to the people who have been victimized by sexual abusers, instead of scapegoating them. Instead of viewing the actual exposure as Bringing Reproach on Jehovah?, they need to recognize, acknowledge and apologize for the activity of molesting children as the cause of the reproach. That would make such a huge difference.

  But as we all know, the WTS is trying to protect its financial assets from being swallowed up by legal settlements to victims - the Amish community has no huge bankroll to draw from, and victims have no hope of any kind of restitution from the Amish community.

  ***

  Rbi8 John 2:14-16 ***

  And he found in the temple those selling cattle and sheep and doves and the money brokers in their seats. 15So, after making a whip of ropes, he drove all those with the sheep and cattle out of the temple, and he poured out the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables. 16 And he said to those selling the doves: "Take these things away from here! Stop making the house of my Father a house of merchandise!"
• 

  JustTickledPink

  I was also very surprised how the Amish boys are taught never to lie to anyone, so they confessed willingly and freely. In a way I feel badly for the boys who taught them this was allowed, I don't believe they were given any sex-ed either, they were left with no direction what to do with their hormones. Now they are in a prison system filled with men who are hard core criminals and they will be educated in prison about life. I think they deserved punishment, definitely, but it seems like it could all have been prevented with a bit of INFORMATION and COMMUNICATION as to what is right and what is wrong. Some limits and boundaries, some direction that the men were there to protect their sisters.

  Maybe I am off-base, can you prevent molestation and incest? Could these boys raised in a more normal environment with other girls around have acted differently? Or is an abuser always going to abuse? It seemed like once the one boy did it, they all followed, then the younger boy molested his 4 year old sister. I'm not familiar enough with the mentality of a sexual molester to know if the abusers were "made" that way by their environment. As for them following the Bible strictly, I thought sinners were stoned to death. Where did this 6 week rule of shunning come in? That is the stupidest punishment I've ever heard of for rape.

  One more point, these communities always put women second, they are second rate citizens, the motherrs, grandmothers, aunts, children, etc... and they have no place to turn. In communities where women are oppressed it seems like a license for the men to do whatever they want.
• 

  Scully

  Where did this 6 week rule of shunning come in? That is the stupidest punishment I've ever heard of for rape.

  The 6 weeks of shunning is the standard punishment for ALL sins in the Amish community, from murder, to rape, to stealing your neighbour's goat, to getting falling-down drunk.

  It's not so different in the JWs - you can get DFd for smoking as easily (or easier perhaps) as you can for molesting a 4 year old.

  What this kind of punishment does is trivialize the very serious CRIMES that have been committed and magnify non-crimes (such as smoking or being an alcoholic or two people in a committed relationship having consensual sex without the benefit of marriage). People develop a warped sense of right and wrong, they have difficulty viewing things from ethical perspectives.
• 

  Mulan

  I watched both programs and was struck by the similarities............handling these situations in house, the shunning, the control, the desire to keep the world outside, etc.

  I felt for those poor young women and the loss of their childhood.

  By the way, the girl shown on Dateline finally was able to get dentures when she went into foster care.

  They said pulling the teeth and getting dentures is common practice among the Amish. It saves on future dental bills. How odd.
• 

  hubert

  Blondie, I didn't realize there were two shows on Amish sexual abuse last night, untill later. So, I thought you made an error in your post. (Shows you how much I know about you. I should have known better). So, I feel I owe you an apology. I apologize.

  When I looked at the cable t.v. guide, I only went as far as 9 p.m., est. and didn't see the write-up for 10 p.m., on 20/20. My mistake. When I realized it after checking it again, around 8:30, I think, I tried to get into the forum, and couldn't log on. I'm glad some people saw from that there were two programs, and were able to view both of them.

  I've never seen this before, where two different stations covered the same topic AT DIFFERENT TIMES, so this is a good thing. It gave more people a chance to view what's happening in the Amish religion.

  Maybe some day soon, there will be two programs, back to back, on the J.W. problem, too.

  Hubert
• 

  Kenneson

  I posted about the discussion here on the Amish abuse forum. Check it out at

  http://www.amishdeception.com

  I'm known over there as EX JW.
• 

  Fleur

  *shudder*

  By the way, the girl shown on Dateline finally was able to get dentures when she went into foster care.

  They said pulling the teeth and getting dentures is common practice among the Amish. It saves on future dental bills. How odd.

  oh that poor girl. I didn't see Dateline but I saw 20/20 and it just made me sick. My husband too. Just disgusting.

  Oh and I don't care how many children that rapist has to support...he should not be allowed to go home from jail to work. Who knows how many other children he will rape in the future? Maybe his own! He wasn't beyond raping his sister what will make his daughters any different?

  The mother made my blood boil. Shame on her. She told Mary that she didn't "fight hard enough or pray enough." Now where have we all heard THAT before???