Education - How encouraging low self esteem creates better witnesses.

by BigG 39 Replies latest jw experiences

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  stillajwexelder

  absolutely - education is wonderful - the Israelites believed in it and so did the apostle Paul - education does help self-esteem - no question at all
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  Neo

  BigG, Darkside Blues and Toladest:

  WELCOME TO THE FORUM!!

  Neo
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  robxy

  To my parents, me getting a higher education was like me wanting to go hit the crack pipe. An abomination. ("You don't need anything more than a high school diploma to get a job and pioneer"...my dad. "Reading the Watchtower and Awake magazines for 4 years is like getting a college degree"...my mom) I got a college degree and ended up in a profession that affords me a very comfortable living. That's not even the point though. The point is that after having been raised "in the truth" and baptized they should have figured that I was strong enough to resist any "worldly temptations" that I might have found through higher education. But even back then they knew I was a critical thinker, able to use logic and reason to come to an understanding of things. All childhood I had been told how much I couldn't do ("you're not smart enough, you're not big enough...") In many ways I'm thankful for those experiences. I have never had an ego (because I don't think I'm very bright). I take my time to make a decision (because I second-guess myself). I'm very tolerant of other peoples beliefs and values (because I know how painful it feels when people aren't). I do wish I had heard the phrase "we're proud of you" just once from my parents though.
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  franklin J

  BigG,

  Yes, I hear you loud and clear; having lived a parrallel life to yours.

  Fortunately for me; I did have a father who eventually ( despite being an Elder) had the satisfaction of seeing his son stand up to all of the local elders ; go to college and become an Architect. I went on to become very successfull , both financially and in my personal life and did not become the drug addict possesed by Demons of which they warned.

  I have "grown" into a rational, thinking adult.

  I agree with you 100% with the low self esteem and the teachings of the Watchtower which foster ignorance and non tolerance. The only way to grow as an individual with self respect is to GET OUT.
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  freedinFlorida

  I'm new to this forum, and God, this really hit home with me. I was raised as a JW and I was always very smart, making straight A's. I was skipped from 1st to 2nd grade in private school. When I graduated at 16, I had full scholarship offers to colleges all over the country, but my dad wouldn't let me go away to college, and since I was underage, he was the one who had to sign the papers. My mom might have let me, but of course with all the stuff about the man being the head of the household, my mom just would sit back and put up with his crap about all kinds of stuff. But that story is a whole other post. Luckily for me, there was a great state university in our city, Jacksonville, but I wasn't even allowed to live on campus, right in the city. I had to drive back and forth. That was when I first really started having doubts about JW's. A lot of people in my congregation had smart things to say to me and my family about me going to college,and it really hurt. I had grown up around these people,they were all I knew, because my dad basically kept us ostracized from most of our blood relatives because they weren't "in the truth". My dad, to his defense,did stand up for me to the "friends" but then I guess the pressure was getting to him, because he started hinting around about maybe I should just stay for two years and get my AA degree and pioneer like another young sister had done who had gone to the same college. Well, smart as she was, the last I heard,she was pioneering up North somewhere and picking grapes for extra money. I said, not me,and I kept going and got my B.A.E. in Special Education. I'm now studying for legal assistant and plan to get my master's in Counseling Psychology and work with women in domestic violence and abused children involved in the legal system(that'll really knock my parents socks off-they were always talking about how it was wrong to study psychology and stuff because it would mess with your mind). Someone hit the nail on the head when they talked about how some "friends" have good lifestyles and they're not expected to give them up. My dad's best friend at the Kingdom Hall is a millionaire who made his money in real estate. I don't hear my dad saying he ought to give all his money away to Bethel or something.
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  Joyzabel

  Welcome to the board, all the newbies on this thread.

  This subject seems always hit a sore spot with jws/xjws.

  Please, everyone get an education and be the best you can be. Don't let ANYONE or organization say what or who you should be.

  I'm so happy young people are waking up and going on with their schooling.

  Great topic. I totally agree that the WTBTS encourages low self-esteem in their followers or otherwise they wouldn't have any followers.

  Joy
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  upside/down

  bttt

  u/d (of the feeling nostalgic class)
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  Wasanelder Once

  Upside Down,

  As I read your words I too recalled the sacrafices I made to please Jehovah. In all honesty it was Jehovah I sought to please. Every time I showed unselfish effort on behalf of others, it was because it brought me satisfaction. To this day I still have satisfaction in having been kind to others during my 9 years pioneering. It came back to me in time in ways I cannot describe to you here. I had spirit lifting times cleaning toilets with others because I shared a purpose with them. Just because the Gov. Body and the whole layout was bull.... in so many ways, can never detract from the expression of my pure motives back then. Think of it, if you weren't pure in motive you would still be in the collective being betrayed. I see it, for me, as more of an awakening from a bad set of circumstances than a tragedy.

  I am in a university now seeking a degree in English. I love it. (I hope I get finished before Armaggeddonnnnn comes! LOL) I'm faded but I still love people and do whatever is in my power to make this life enjoyable for people who are in a worse situation than I. No way will I let the New Yorkers and the drones make me bitter or disturbed. Its not worth the effort. I don't speak Borganese though.

  W.Once
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  evita

  This really strikes a nerve. I had two teachers in High School who actually cried when I told them my mother would not let me attend college. They were trying to help me get scholarships and couldn't believe that my mom wouldn't sign the necessary papers.
  So I worked in low paying jobs, saved my money, and eventually moved out. I started college at the age of 24 and got my B.A. in English Lit. almost six years later. It was hard work to support myself all the way through but I did get some grants which helped a bit.
  Wish I had gone on to get my MA while I was in the groove but I had three great kids instead, so I can't complain.
  
  I am glad I finished college. I regret not going earlier. Even more so, I regret that the dubs don't encourage people to use their gifts and abilities and to follow their passions. Even attending college, I didn't know what that meant or how to do so. In my senior year I finally found a couple of mentors and started to understand some of my potential.
  
  So I say, go to college! But also explore all of your possibilities and find good mentors.
  
  Eva
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  upside/down

  Yes.... "A mind is a terrible thing to waste"- Negro College Fund Slogan.

  u/d (of the couldn't agree more class)