"Bethel labs" is a secret laboratory in Brooklyn where intricate experiments are painstakingly carried out, day and night. Our fearless brothers donate their time and energy to determine the precise amount of hair spray that persons should use, so that we will all know the exact point at which spikey hair becomes too spikey. As well, there is a lineup of young men trying on pants several sizes too big, in a selfless effort to determine just how baggy is too baggy.
And of course, shapely sisters are hiking their hems while being observed by a roomful of bethelites attached to erect-o-meters, to determine just how short is too short for a skirt.
Senile men are watching cartoons, violence, and pornography to determine the exact point at which individual Christian consciences become seared.
Yes, we can all be thankful that our dear brothers are sacrificing themselves to perform these experiments, so that we will not need to run the risk of searing our consciences with our own experience