Shunning....done with a spirit of love or with a spirit of hate???

by chuckyy 11 Replies latest jw experiences

  • chuckyy
    chuckyy

    I went to take my daughter to school today and right at the end of her line was a JW with her child. Seeing as I had to take my child to her line, I had to stand very close to her. I seen her out of the corner of my eye looking at me. With that, in a deliberate sort of movement that was meant to be seen, she turned her back and walked about 15 ft away and stood there instead. This same person went out of JW's a few years ago and got married in a church...but was never disfellowshipped and yet...she can do this without a pang of conscience. Talk about hypocrisy!!!!

    My wofe and I have to see at least 3 witnesses on the school run everyday and they treat us like we are skum.

    Shunning in there case is NOT a loving provision...it is done with a spirit of hate. Has that been the case in your experience too????

  • TheEdge
    TheEdge

    It's self - preservation (on THEIR part) - and so they can FEEL superior, because they AREN'T.

    Sorry - this makes me sooooo angry.

  • jeanniebeanz
    jeanniebeanz

    chuckyy,

    They are doing it out of fear of you and your family. Remember, rank and file are not told what you da'd for. For all they know you are an ax murderer.

    It was not until I was out of the cult and made contact with other df'd people and started finding out what they were df'd for that I found out that my fears were unfounded. Here are some of the reasons I found;

    caught with a joint

    caught looking at an anti jw site

    caught going to the police to report an abusive mate

    re-married without the blessings of the elders

    routinly broke cerfew (15 year old)

    wore a dress that was too short and then told the elders to shove it when they complained (16 yr old)

    allowed daughter to have a blood transfusion to save her life

    questioned the doctrine of the 1975 fiasco

    could not give up the tobacco

    would not shun a child

    etc., etc., etc.,

    I always thought they were evil people and deserved to be taught a lesson, now I know better. I wish you could just say f*** you to those losers and walk away for good, but wish you well in whatever you decide to do. Feel really bad for your little one... (((hugs)))

    Jean

  • chok
    chok

    They do this because apparently...its supposed to help you come to your senses and return to the fold! Its a loving provision, dont you forget that!

    Are you feeling the urge to return?

    As one who is currently going through the whole shunning experience, its strengthening my resolve to keep walking...in the other direction!

    Chok

  • FairMind
    FairMind

    Some of the Witnesses get a real power trip by shunning others. I think most Witnesses though do the shunning without any evil intent and are just following what they have been told they should do. There are always two sides to every story and I for one like to hear both.

    FM

  • Jez
    Jez

    I feel it is NOT done at all with love and it is a perversion of the very word.

    I have had one freak hold his hand to his eyes to shield himself from me as he passed by me.

    Other JW's are confused by the whole thing sometimes and look embarrassed when I say, "Hi! And how are you and your children?"

  • Honesty
    Honesty

    If you have been shunned, etc. just keep in mind that the 'spritual feeding program' they are on causes them to follow the example of their 'Great Architect" and "Communicator". I always try to remember what the Bible teaches about our relationships with our fellow man and then pray for them because they don't know what they are doing to themselves.

  • Purza
    Purza
    They do this because apparently...its supposed to help you come to your senses and return to the fold! Its a loving provision, dont you forget that!

    Are you feeling the urge to return?

    That statement cracked me up. It is so true. Shunning just creates anger and misery in people -- not a feeling of wanting to return. What a joke the whole structure is!

    Purza

  • Room 215
    Room 215

    They have the figures; if their avowed intent is to restore the DFd, they ought to know how badly its failing.

  • JustTickledPink
    JustTickledPink

    I have an aunt (by marriage) who treated me like absolute scum and yelled at me when I attended my grandfather's funeral. What was so precious about it, was she was DF'd for a year after she was caught cheating on my uncle, in fact I do believe she slept with almost every construction worker in their town.

    Of course she has the right to judge me. hahahaa... it was so laughable.

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