How would you reply??

by chrissee 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • chrissee
    chrissee

    I have been fading for over 2 yrs and recently visited my folks. (see my first post at http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/81356/1.ashx ) I did tell them when I got there that I would not be attending any meetings. And they accepted it at the moment and didn't say much. I did tell my father that I would not send a DA letter, because my mother had told me in the past that she would not talk to me or my kids if I did.

    I just got a letter in the mail today from them and it goes something like this:

    Dear XXX,

    We have been very sad since you told us of how you feel. You know Satan is trying to destroy all he can in these last days. And believe me he will work on those who are weak. A thoughtless word (spoken or read) from someone, a thoughtless act by someone, that's all it takes for weak ones to feel that Jehovah is not real and what they've learned about him is not the truth. (I'll add in at this point that they found out I looked on this site while on vacation and asked me if I knew it was an apostate site, I said, "oh, is it?") continuing with the letter. That's what Satan wants to do DISCOURAGE. With Jehovah there can't be untruth. You think this is mans organization because men take care of the organization. This is the way it was done in the beginning the Isrealites were to care for the earthly things and Jehovah cares for the spiritual things.

    We don't know how you came to your decision but we pray you pray to Jehovah before you write your letter. (Which I'm not planning to) Talk to me about it. Don't let Satan take you from Jehovah and us. We pray you will think about what this will mean for your family. If you give up there will be a division that can not be bridged. (as in they will not talk to me anymore) I'm torn because I will have to talk to the brothers up their sooner or later. (which I told my husband would happen if I said too much)

    We love you dearly but our loyalty belongs to Jehovah. If what you learned is still a little active in you then PLEASE let it effect your decision.

    Jehovah is loving and kind, if you change your mind he will accept you back. Remember we are not all SPIRITUALLY MATURE so if you need to talk to someone please do so. (the words in caps are their own.)

    it was unsigned by them. No, sincerely, or love always at the bottom. Just the note.

    So, how would you respond?? I'm wondering if I should write a letter back or email or should I just talk to them on the phone. I do know I'm not planning on returning to the KH. I still have a belief in God, just not a particular organization. I also may be setting myself up, if they are lurking on the site. But it's not going to change the way I feel. I love God, not JW's organization, Period.

    Thanks to all!

  • JustTickledPink
    JustTickledPink

    It's so hard to say, but this is the conclusion I have come to with my own life.

    People make their own choices, they have a CHOICE before them, to accept you as their child and give you unconditional love OR to as they put it "remain loyal to Jehovah" which really translates to, remain loyal to the WTS. I can't imagine a mother and a father shunning you for rejection of the religion solely, that seems so ridiculous. Other parents have reasons such as immorality, etc, but beleiving something different is not a good enough reason to reject you.

    My mother doesn't associate with me and I have come to accept it as her choice, but I will not fake who I am or what I believe in. I don't like to lie, the one thing I am in life is HONEST. I'm not perfect, but I am honest and have integrity and will not lie to myself or others.

    Sending you lots of love and hugs.

  • frenchbabyface
    frenchbabyface

    (((Chrissee)))

    ditto JTP !!! Take care of yourself ... love them how there are nothing more nothing less ... you have a life (and it's not their one) !

  • Peppermint
    Peppermint

    ?If you give up there will be a division that can not be bridged. (as in they will not talk to me anymore) I'm torn because I will have to talk to the brothers up their sooner or later. (which I told my husband would happen if I said too much)?

    Explain that this idea of a division is their doing and not yours. If communication stops between the two of you, only they can reinstate it. Make them responsible for it.

  • ezekiel3
    ezekiel3

    Peppermint: my thoughts exactly

    Don't let Satan take you from Jehovah and us.

    No, it's the WTS that will separate you, not "Satan."

    Chrissee: lay low and fade unless you want to be DA'd. Thank your parents for their concern, but don't antagonize them either. They are programmed to reject if you do this. Why? It's like the "body snatchers" or something. Once you are labeled a "Satan zombie" their very faith in God is challenged.

    Stay away from that trip-wire if you can.

  • chrissee
    chrissee

    thanks to all for your replies...

  • Dragonlady76
    Dragonlady76

    Peppermint's advice is right on!

  • chrissee
    chrissee

    sorry, wasn't done....

    thanks to all your replies....

    Peppermint says:

    No, it's the WTS that will separate you, not "Satan."

    I agree...also with just tickled pinks words:

    People make their own choices, they have a CHOICE before them, to accept you as their child and give you unconditional love OR to as they put it "remain loyal to Jehovah" which really translates to, remain loyal to the WTS. I can't imagine a mother and a father shunning you for rejection of the religion solely, that seems so ridiculous. Other parents have reasons such as immorality, etc, but beleiving something different is not a good enough reason to reject you.

    Although that is just what they are planning on doing...rejecting me solely on my choice to not go to the KH. I have no other reasons for their shunning me. I have a great marriage, a wonderful husband, obedient children. I don't do drugs, drink or cheat on my husband. I just choose not to go to the KH, any longer.

    Also, Peppermint, I do try and 'stay low'. Thanks!

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    chrissee I'm sorry you are going through this, it makes me very sad what the WTS does to families.

    We love you dearly but our loyalty belongs to Jehovah. If what you learned is still a little active in you then PLEASE let it effect your decision.

    Jehovah is loving and kind, if you change your mind he will accept you back. Remember we are not all SPIRITUALLY MATURE so if you need to talk to someone please do so. (the words in caps are their own.)

    What a twist on thoughts, they are loyal to a loving kind god who wants them to act unloving by shunning their child. It makes no sense to me at all! It's something I couldn't do to my son when he was DF'ed, I've never shunned him, I prayed to Jehovah to have that child and I'll be damned if I was going to shun him especially at a time in his life when he needed his family support emotionally. Good grief, is not god of more intelligence than the WTS gives him credit for? It's all about control, cults are like that.

    Sad, hang in there!

    Kate

  • Es
    Es

    hi Chrissie,

    I'm kinda in the same boat. I told my family im not interested anymore and if they were happy to accept that then I wouldnt send my D/A letter. They said they were ok with that, but a few weeks before that they had sent me a letter about getting D/F and they begged me not to leave them and they couldnt handle loosing me, but if thats what you decide we will follow the guidelines and not talk to you.......whose leaving who

    hope all goes well

    es

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