The Myth of Unconditional Love

by frankiespeakin 42 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  zen nudist

  from a oneness of all point of view... if I you can contemplate hacking off parts of your body to prevent the whole from becoming cancerous... what relationship to what other part of your extended body, the rest of humanity are you unwilling to hack off for any reason? people can sometimes be so infected with either bad programming or bad physiology as to be a direct threat to the body of humanity and perhaps require radical surgery [the death penalty?] but not as a measure of vengence but in the same way we

  [?]euthanize a rabid beloved pet.
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  peacefulpete

  disinterested love eh? You mean like tthe alledged compulsory "priciple love" we were to feel for 'worldly' people while not desiring to be next to them or have affection for them? Even synonyms like compassion or concern really exaggerate the limited place in our world we gave them by preaching at them while condemning their lifestyles and beliefs.
  

  Love has a biological element most certainly but it is a response to nurture as well. When left to wither it can. It may be replaced with obsesssion or projected self pity, that can be agonizingly powerful but the healthy and joy producing love dies when neglected. Love that is really healthy is not easily set aside as it is based upon similarities that are enduring. (past, personality, ambitions values etc) Religion when it is of a form that consumes the personality and tries to replace it can separate even those whose relationship was based on this healthy and enduring love. What most people call unconditional love is love that is between people who want to love each other and so try to preserve it when minor differences arise.
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  sassafrass

  I never recieved a promise of unconditional love from the JW organization, just that I was granted it from Jehovah. My love for my children is so intense I cannot imagine anything they could do to stop me from loving them. If they did something wrong I wouldn't be able to help but wonder how I'd misguided them, or otherwise fell short as a parent. If I had created them myself I would feel even more responsible. If Jehovah ,as our, father shares the same feelings for his children as I do for mine then there is no myth about the idea of unconditional love. If I had to spend a lifetime, and then perhaps eternity buttkissing trying to stay in the good graces and under the " conditions" of a GOD ( who to boot made me imperfect ) just to gain his love and acceptance, that would be hell enough for me and I would rather be dead. I would not follow such a GOD. If I am wrong and that is the way GOD is then I'll go wherever he keeps his rejects and spend eternity plotting against his vain, pretentious little ass. The one thing that I took from the Jehovah Witnesses that they did not take from me however, is my faith in Jehovah. ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE MY FRIEND!
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  ezekiel3

  The argument of conditional vs unconditional love is largely a western vs eastern argument of religion.

  In the most general terms:

  Western = distinct personal god/s with power of judgement and execution, your classic Jehovah.

  Eastern = nonpersonal god who is actually the sum of existance, in effect we being part of the body of god.

  For those of us who understand the Eastern side, unconditional love makes sense, because we are the same thing.

  And, please, please, please do not confuse pure love with babies and sex. It is instinctual to care for our children unconditionally, we are hard-wired for it. And the glow of attraction between two "lovers" - sorry, just more instinct and a little hormone for spice. Maybe a bit brutal, but if you do not believe in the interconnection of all things, that's all you have.

  Sadly, this English language provides only one word for all of the above, and so we are left to argue the semantics of "love."
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  purplesofa

  I am a bit scared to post my thoughts.......but I have been thinking of this alot lately. In several different circumstances.
  
  First in picking a marriage mate within the org. I rarely ever hear anyone talk much about endearing qualities in potential mates.......ones that last in a person...their character ...the essence of who they are. Like when a job is lost, or they drift away, or get disfellowshipped. They would still be the person you would be married to and obligated to stay with.
  So, I find when the JW's are looking they first look for spiritual strength (well that is the suggestion) and then when that fades, the real unconditional love you would need for a spouse is not there. I find it rather difficult to hear over and over the advice the society gives for the commitment of marriage.
  I have never once heard....Do you love this person for who they are without all the outside stuff cuz that could all go away. This person could leave the truth. Do you love them enough to stay commited even then? I think then we would be allowed to love differently, yes unconditionally and not so conditionally.
  I know this is a bit off from the other posts. After dating several brothers, I find myself saying to my friends. I must love the man, not if he is an elder or pioneer or whatever.
  The love must be unconditional. The very essence and truth of who we really are. Does that make sense?
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  MungoBaobab

  A dog's love is not unconditional. Give it a chance to live among its own kind and it'll go Call of the Wild on your ass faster than you can say "Jack London." There is also no universal unconditional love between a parent and child, else there would be no deadbeat dads, no abandoned babies, and dare I say it, no abortions.
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  willyloman

  Putting aside for the moment the definitions and the philosophical phrases, one thing seems clear to me.

  Love is a verb.

  It's an active thing you put into practice, something you "show" by your actions. You can talk about it all day (and dubs do), but it's what you do when the chips are down that manifests real love. You can call it conditional/unconditional, or whatever, but it doesn't matter what you call it. What do you DO?

  When I was "in" the JW ranks, I was a judgmental hypocrite. I belonged to an organization that claimed it was the embodiment of Christian love, God's love. If anyone walked off the path, even just a little, they were slapped upside the head with a sledgehammer. We called this treatment "love," as in "Disfellowshipping is really a loving thing to do." And we'd quote (and misapply) that scripture that says the father who really loves his son, disciplines him.

  Once a dub was branded "weak" or thought to be lacking spirituality, the "love" was withdrawn, replaced with judgment. The sad truth is, as JWs, we shot our wounded. And we called that love.

  Now that I'm once again a member of the human race, I "love" people. I show love -- basic human kindness -- more readily than I used to. I love them by giving them the benefit of the doubt. I love them by respecting their belief systems and habits, even if I don't agree with them. I love people by letting them be who they are and not judging them.

  I think that's what we're talking about here. Call it unconditional love if you want. It may not be completely unconditional. But it stands in stark contrast to the clearly CONDITIONAL love we were taught to practice by the Watchtower.
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  jeanniebeanz

  Give it a chance to live among its own kind and it'll go Call of the Wild on your ass faster than you can say "Jack London."

  naw, don't buy it.

  J
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  Thinking

  Once a dub was branded "weak" or thought to be lacking spirituality, the "love" was withdrawn, replaced with judgment. The sad truth is, as JWs, we shot our wounded. And we called that love.
  
  
  
  
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  gypsywildone

  To me, Peaceful is making the most sense here. If society on the whole believe that there will be some kind of "unconditional love" out there, no matter what they do, what is left to control their behavior with reguard to laws? What stake in doing good would many have if they felt they didn't have to be governed in any way because they would receive "unconditional love" no matter what they did?

  I think unconditional love is a myth promoted by some, if not most, Western religions. It is some vague, unattainable myth some people keep striving for. If you have love for yourself, all else will follow. JMHO.