by Cygnus 13 Replies latest jw friends
Since my episode, which is chronicled elsewhere on this board, my JW parents are driving up from Florida to stay a week with me. My ex-wife, who *I* divorced mainly because she was JW, came to see me tonight without my calling, just to check up on me and make sure I was okay.
Some JWs aren't THAT bad, friends. Remember that when you think of blindly look to condemn them all.
Some JWs aren't THAT bad, friends. Remember that when you think of blindly look to condemn them all
Most of us know this. You get the Good and the Bad every where you go.
Brooke
yeah... i know a lot of jw's i still love a lot and who would be good people regardless of their choice of religion.
Some JWs aren't THAT bad, friends. Remember that when you think of blindly look to condemn them all.
So true. Sometimes we tend to lose sight of that.
We also have to remember that most of the things that JWs do that are mean-spirited---are very often done as "obedience to Jehovah" or so they are led to believe.
It seems as if your ex-wife is a very caring lady with a good heart.
hugs,
Annie
True Cygnus, but in describing your "episode", you talked of, after 8 years, still having feelings of religous guilt, did you not?
Frankly, if you can't get pissed off at the dumb-ass hurtful religion enough to get over having even a trace of guilt (or worry about Jehovah, whatever), then you ought to face the religion down intellectually (the prefered method anyway). You made it sound as if this residual crap was a part of your psychosis, so I'd recommend you attend to this.
It's a bit insane to choose to carry around religous angst. Choose not to.
I'm glad your parents and ex are liberal enough to be there in your time of need. They do it in opposition to the character and urgings of their religion.
Hello there friend, I'm very happy for you that you've had some contact with these people you care about. I very much feel the same as others, that most people at the end of the day aren't really malicious, they're just living their interpretation of what they hope to be right.
I am happy for you, but I found that I got tired of being put at an arms length, to be contacted only at the family I loves convenience. It seems they can reach out to you whenever they have the need, but you don't have the same liberties. I have recently gotten to the point (after 3 years ex) where I no longer want the effects of unhealthy disapproval and sympathy from them. I always feel when my family does contact me, occassional email or text message, or very rare phone call that they approach the conversation in a way that showers pity on me. I know that they truly don't believe that I can possibly make a success of my life having left the JW org. (sorry mate I've gotten off the track from you to me!!). I also know that the reaching out they did to me for the first 2years of my being disfellowshipped was far more than they do now. I guess they've given up "hope" that I have changed my point of view. So my feeling is that they extend love to you at whatever there "consciounce" will allow, plus fresh after the facts they are hoping that some small extensions of kindnesses, to show you what you've lost might make you see the error of your ways.
Sorry if I've turned this around, and put a depressing light on your situation. But I have learnt to become an absolute realist, for living in hope that things will change only left me in transition, not really moving on with my life. I do hope though that you enjoy the time with your family, and that it doesn't make you in any way sad:-) xox
living in hope that things will change only left me in transition, not really moving on with my life.
True, very true. I don't even return their communication any more. The only time I was ever hearing anything from them it was all about trying to make me feel bad for writing the witness thing off and 'how could you make us have to shun you' bologna anyhow. What a crock.
Who needs it? Certainly not *this* little black duck! (to quote Daffy)
Jeannie
Frog, thanks for the kind words.
Six, I've been on these boards for eight years. I know what I'm talking about and what I am doing. I quit the JWs in 1997 and was finally DF'd in 2000 for association with a DF'd person. Had a good time with it all. But thanks man.
Cygnus, I'm well aware that you've been around a long time. My post either has merit or it doesn't. YOUR comments about YOUR feelings/thoughts in YOUR thread about YOUR very BIG problem make it sound as if you haven't stared down the witness stupidity. If that's the case, then my post has merit whether you blow it off or not. I don't have bouts of guilt or wonder about an ancient hebrew diety or the just-plain-idiotic religion he spawned. If you do, you ought to face it and get over it. That from a person who doesn't use the word "ought" very much.
Quote: "I am going on eight years out of the Jehovah's Witnesses and I still have dreams of district conventions and people I know and respect calling it "the truth." Yet I feel like there's only two things that existence can entail - this is all just a big mistake and an accident and none of it matters anyway, or we're all performers and portrayers in some unknowable superbeing's fantasy. My conscience kills me sometimes and I don't know why I let it matter to me." EndQuote
If this is a mental illness and not something you can think your way out of, then I apologize.
Cyg,
I'm so glad that you are on the recieving end of some positive events in your life. Even though you must deal with the negative emotions and actions right now, don't forget to make room for a few things that give you pleasure. It may be something like attending a sports event or as simple as soaking in a hot tub of bubbles with a good book until your skin reminds you of a prune.
Thanks for the update.
NewLight2
ps
I don't know if you know this or not, but JWD has another poster with a similiar screen name as mine (their's is 'new light'). I just didn't want you to confuse the 2 of us.
