Metatron, if there was ever an ex-JW Bethel....you would definitely be in charge of the writing department.
Well said. I'm looking forward to part 2!
The Watchtower in Crisis: Why They Can't Raise Good Kids (pt 1)
by metatron 13 Replies latest jw friends
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jgnat
Here's a few more factors to consider. Concerned Mama has noted that JW teens are worse than their "worldly" counterparts when unsupervised. They drink more, they drink younger, they sleep around more. I think there are a few reasons for this.
- They have been told all their lives that the "world" is full of all sorts of depraved activites. They believe their own propoganda.
- Nearly all behavior is tolerated as long as it is with other JW's. The worst thing a JW teen can do is associate with non-JW's. I think parents fear losing their children altogether, so they allow them to sow their "wild oats" (amongst other JW youth) hoping they will eventuallly settle to the only life they know.
- Appearances are far more important than honesty. Many JW youth have figured out that as long as they don't tell, they won't be asked.
- The awful price of confession. We know a JW girl involved in drugs. A concerned friend asked if she should approach the parents or the Kingdom Hall about her problem. Concerned Mama and I both said "NO"! To bring this problem to light would result in a devastating separation from her family and friends. The elders would not suggest a "worldly" counsellor to actually help the poor girl with her addiction. She would be advised to study more and get out in to field service.
- I have noticed an odd distance between JW mothers and their offspring. I think this is because of the transitory nature of their relationship. Any slip-up by any member of the family means they are cut off forever. The mother can either go neurotic and push all her children to Baptism and Bethel, or become apathetic and keep her emotional distance in case she has to cut off association.
- The conflicting instructions to remain "mild" and yet to control their family's behavior results in some pretty weird parental control methods. A JW father verbally cut down his children and his wife in front of me. They obeyed, but at what cost to their self-worth?
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roybatty
Appearances are far more important than honesty. Many JW youth have figured out that as long as they don't tell, they won't be asked.
I believe it even goes a bit further. JW kids are raised to hide the truth, to basically lie. Why do I say this? Well, not only do young JW's see the adults in the congregation "bending the rules" (if not outright breaking them) but they see the Society leading a double life. They hear at the meetings and read between the lines that ALL worldly people are worshippers of the Satan and will die at the big A. However, when talking to worldly people to their face, it's all "no, no, no, God will decided who dies and who doesn't. We don't teach that." Or even with the whole disfellowshipping issue. They see how cruel it is and know the true story of how these ones are treated. But when in front of the media or non-JW, they see the Society "wag the dog" and spin it, trying to explain that it's really for that own person's good and that they basically can come back whenever they want.
So they are surrounded by adults who aren't honest and in a religion that twists the truth, it's no wonder that the WT has a hard time raising good kids. How can they expect their kids to be honest, when they themselves aren't? And without honesty and the ability to trust, one can't even hope to raise a good kid.
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willyloman
roybatty:
in a religion that twists the truth, it's no wonder that the WT has a hard time raising good kids. How can they expect their kids to be honest, when they themselves aren't?
Brilliant summary of this whole topic. Wow.