Hill -- Your post sounds a little like a counrty western song. Timing is important, but sometimes it's up to us to adjust where we're at, and where we want to be. Best to you!
Timing or Karma?
by hillbilly 17 Replies latest jw friends
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pleaseer2001
Hi Hill!
First I want to give you a hug!!!!
I know that our choices in life take us to a place where we beginto think and feel more or less of a situtation. Some times emotions can be so srong it makes us question them. All I can say is be true to yourself! Do what you truely feel you need to make you complete as a person. I don't think we should ever put our feelings on a back burner. Timing can sometimes be cruel and heartless..but at the same time have the power to heal in a very powerfull way. Do what is best for you!!! but always way the others who are involved. You should never feel like you owe someone your feelings....but you do owe them to be honest!
P2
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MerryMagdalene
I tend to agree w/ P2 about honesty. A book I have called Loving Relationships says:
"People are afraid to tell each other some things because they think they might hurt the other person or themselves. Well, it hurts you both much more if you fail to communicate whatever it is. First of all, your body will be in pain if you are withholding communication; second, the other person will become confused; and third, the relationship will get crazy. The truth will eventually come out anyway, and by then the mistrust and anger may be so great that the whole relationship will blow up.
"Begin with this thought: It is safe to tell the truth, and the more I tell the truth about my feelings the better I will feel and the better others will feel."
Don't know if this is appropriate or applicable to your situation or not though.
~Merry
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zen nudist
"Begin with this thought: It is safe to tell the truth, and the more I tell the truth about my feelings the better I will feel and the better others will feel."
unless your mate is capable of a jealous and murderous rage..... some people just cannot deal with reality.
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talesin
you like directness, so here's my take on it.
We are both of a mature age, so in that context ...
Re: Timing or Karma?
Neither. Narcissism.
Do or do not.
Stop creating drama.
Decide, move on.
What was, is not. What never was, cannot be.
p, l & h
t
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adelmaal
Temtation would be my answer.
Are you sure you're not already with the right one and just going through a rough patch? I cannot even begin to know because I'm not in your relationship or your circumstances but I've come to appreciate the phrase, "The grass is not greener on the other side of the fence unless you are neglecting your own lawn."
I have been in the situation where I thought the right one came along and I thought I was with the wrong one. I ended up turning my life upside down for someone who ended up not being the right one (he left me 7 months pregnant for another woman; guess he thought she was the right one - LOL). Now my children are in split homes.
My husband and I have both been through divorce and we believe we are now with the right person. The thing I try to remember about our relationship is that there will be times when we feel like we no longer love eachother or we are not even liking eachother (those will probably be the times when someone else looks better) but if we work through those times our relationship will be that much stronger for it.
Hang in there... I'm sorry you are having to go through this.
Personally though, I think leaving one relationship for another seldom works. Not that you shouldn't leave a relationship that does not make you happy. I just think it's better to leave because you are unhappy rather than to leave because you think someone else will make you happy.
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bem
Merry...
feeling like you may have found the right person at the wrong time?
Don't know if those words helped Hill or not but it helped me. Sometimes that doesn't matter but it's a good way to hear it.
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Winston Smith :>D
Why is it so hard to do the right thing sometimes?
~Hill
Define "right".
You should never feel like you owe someone your feelings....but you do owe them to be honest!
P2
Agreed
A person who can not deal with Reality- with the now, with the feelings of the mate who they claim to "Love", such a person does not deserve to be in that relationship. If they care more about their own feelings being hurt over the well-being of their "loved one" who desires to be honest and talk about their relationship in it's current state, then that person is an anchor, makes you stagnant, and will never spur you to expand, grow and Heal your Soul. They are only holding you down. The answer then is already there. True Love would prefer to free a person they Love, allowing them to grow and Heal their Soul rather than imprison them into a stagnant relationship; then killing both Soul's happiness, their needed Healing, and the Soul's possible contribution and healing for Humanity."Begin with this thought: It is safe to tell the truth, and the more I tell the truth about my feelings the better I will feel and the better others will feel."
unless your mate is capable of a jealous and murderous rage..... some people just cannot deal with reality. Zen nudist