The Memorials coming up......and ...... (page 3)

cruzanheart

I understand, Scooby. To me, the Memorial was always a sacred occasion, probably because my dad partook of the emblems and treated it as a very important day. He wasn't weird about it, just really, really believed. And so did I! I would look at the moon each Memorial night and think how the same moon hung over Jerusalem the night of Jesus' death. I saw that moon all over the world: St. Croix, Australia, Texas, and it was special every year.

Then, as the hypocrisy began to tear down this nice little faith I had, I saw how pretentious the Memorial was, or rather the people who attended. I really hated it when, because of all the congregations, it was decided to have it at a local Holiday Inn, and then at the Plano Convention Center. Seemed kind of cheap then. I still liked hearing Dad give the talk, and perhaps that was all I really liked about it.

I don't miss it at all now; in fact, the thought of attending one makes me kind of nauseous. It would remind me too much of Dad, how he was treated, how he died a couple of weeks before Memorial two years ago. There are no people who would genuinely welcome me, at least not in this area! And just as sincerely as I believed back then, I am equally certain now that this is NOT where God wants me to be. I have "prove[n] to myself the good and acceptable and perfect will of God" and it ain't the JW's!

So on Thursday night I'll look at the moon and wonder if it really happened as the Bible said, because now I have the freedom to think that maybe it's all just a story. And I will remember the good times, cry a little for my dad, and enjoy my memories. But I will be very very happy to be who I am now.

I am free.

Nina

ScoobySnax

I can respect that Nina, and I hope it doesn't make you feel nauseous to know that I would hug you either way.

It was strange you said what you said about the moon. I stood out in the garden tonight and saw a nearly full moon, and thought the same things you used to. I always see that when I go to the memorial and think back.

I can't begin to imagine your pain about your dad, and whatever I post I mean no disrespect.

I will go to the Memorial and hypocritical for me or not, it will be just as important as it was to me when I was growing up. it is important to me, and something I really want to be there. I know others might celebrate it in another way, or might not at all anymore, but that is where I still feel Jehovah's spirit is, and where I can personally remember what Jesus did for us. It is my personal reasoning still, even after all this time.

I guess we'll both be looking up at that moon on Thursday night.

Be well Nina

Scott

minimus

sweeeeeet

GetBusyLiving

:So on Thursday night I'll look at the moon and wonder if it really happened as the Bible said, because now I have the freedom to think that maybe it's all just a story.

((((nina)))). Its tough. I was invited by an old friend to attend the memorial today. This will be the first one I miss. Its harder for me than I let on. Im glad you are happy where you are with things right now.

GBL

Valis

but that is where I still feel Jehovah's spirit is,

I simply do not see how you could Scoob. I have tried very hard to understand you point of view, but this one simply astounds me. If you really feel some Jehovah spirit then perhaps you should go back to being a Witness....however why not have some crackers and listen to this song on Passover?

I Have Forgiven Jesus

I was a good kid, I wouldn't do you no harm, I was a nice kid, With a nice paper round
Forgive me any pain, I may have brung to you, With God's help I know, I'll always be near to you

But Jesus hurt me, When he deserted me, but, I have forgiven you Jesus
For all the desire, You placed in me when there's nothing I can do with this desire

I was a good kid, Through hail and snow, I'd go just to moon you, I carried my heart in my hand
Do you understand, Do you understand

But Jesus hurt me, When he deserted me, but, I have forgiven you Jesus
For all of the love, You placed in me when there's no one I can turn to with this love

Monday - humiliation, Tuesday - suffocation, Wednesday - condescension, Thursday - is pathetic
By Friday life has killed me, By Friday life has killed me, Oh pretty one, Oh pretty one

Why did you give me so much desire, When there is nowhere I can go to offload this desire?
And why did you give me so much love in a loveless world, When there is no one I can turn to
To unlock all this love?
And why did you stick in self deprecating bones and skin?, Jesus do you hate me?
Why did you stick in self deprecating bones and skin?
Do you hate me?, Do you hate me?, Do you hate me?, Do you hate me?, Do you hate me?

ScoobySnax

Valis.....Sometimes I'm totally astounded that some ex-JWs have gone as wacky as they have, but if I expose myself to it, then I should learn not to moan too much about it. Its sort of reverse from where you are now.

I'll pass on your Jacobs

(Crackers) that is!

Scoob

Flash

I'll see some old friends, some I really miss and care deeply about.

Me too, and yet, I'm shunned or treated as 2nd class by the majority. I'll go again this year but I may discontinue attending. I don't feel I'm abandoning Jehovah by not attending. I still live by His standards. Although, the Witnesses wouldn't always agree! Uh-uh, oh no, NOT him!

Valis

Actually Scoob that is Morrissey...one of your own kind bemoaning the shitty treatment at the hands of religion...Don't accuse me of being crazy when you are the one with the fence post halfway in and halfway out of yer arse..

Sincerely,

District Overbeer

ScoobySnax

Valis......Fair enuff. But know that I never accused you of being crazy.........I said "some" it wasn't an agenda to start that all up again.

And I'll still pass on "Morrisey" whoever he is.

Rabbit

Scooby, You had a lot of pressure from people who naturaly want you 'off the fence'. This is hard for you, because of relatives or beliefs that you are having trouble walking away from.

My advice ? Take the time YOU need to be comfortable. Fading is good to find out who your true friends are. It took me several years of being less active, until I was just gone, the Elders haven't contacted me for 4 years now...same house, same #. Maybe they are putting out so many fires in the KH that they don't have time to go after faders.

When You are ready...is the important thing. My doubts had to build up, untill there was no return.

The Memorial was celbrated in my own house, with unleaved bread & red wine. We both partook, because, Jesus said for all his followers to do it. We said the prayers. It was calm and beautiful. I don't feel the need to do it this year.

I am a free mind and spirit, If I am doing something wrong...Jah will forgive just for trying,

Rabbit & Wife

The Memorials coming up......and ......

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