Hi, HOWRESTRICTED ARE JEHOVAHS WITNESSES REGARDING PUBLIC DISPLAYS OF AFFECTION? Brief summary: Background I've been going out with my sexy baby gurl for 8 mnths now (although her parents only think it's been 5 months) she is not baptised and last time I checked she was still unsure,(I'm Methodist myself). Point If she sees someone from her assembly she will stop holding me or not kiss me goodbye because the person(s) are in the vicinity and may see us because apparently it's against her religion. I find this hard to believe. She worrys alot about inconsequential things and gets paranoid very easily thats why I don't fully believe her when she says public affection is frowned upon in her religion. She probably thinks that she may get in trouble for it, because I'm her 1st b/frend and her parents are rather strict. (Added to that her father is an elder, she has to "uphold his name"...) She is not baptised. Conclusion I think mainly she can't disappoint/dishonour her family by telling them that she can't live the restricted life of a Witness, and if she does muster up the courage to do this she will have nowhere to go... She's stuck... :-(
Restricted Relationship... :-(
by Innocent_By-Stander 13 Replies latest social relationships
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stillajwexelder
actually public displays of affection betwween man and wife are encouraged by JWs
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Innocent_By-Stander
Thanks for the reply... Sorry didn't I make that clear we are dating she is my girlfriend... We aren't married... Any other advice?
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Balsam
JW's think public displays of affection to be tacky and ungodly. And especially if you are a worldly person which means you are not a JW. A little affection by married people is tolerated outside the Kingdom Hall. Your girlfriend has lots of reasons to be paranoid, it is a paranoid religion she has been raised in. She is afraid that she will be shunned by her friends and family in the JW's even if she is unbaptized. Tough spot to be in. Best to avoid places where JW might go. She is not fooling you.
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Innocent_By-Stander
*whisper* But they could be anywhere... :-) So she's not fooling me... :-/ (I kinda wish she was coz now this makes things worse...) You know, when we are alone she is so happy and I see she is so free, but when the JW's are around *angry-face* she totally closes up and puts on this act,to be all godly and so proper I see the hurt and despondance in her eyes... I want to help her but what can I do...? :-(
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Scully
What your girlfriend is doing is what JWs call Leading A Double Life?. In order for her to not get in trouble with her JW family and her congregation, she must put on a pretense and keep you at arm's length in public.
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Innocent_By-Stander
Yes, I know and understand what she is doing and why... :-/ But it doesn't make me feel any better, how can anyone live like that...? :-( How can I help should I make up a dumb excuse and leave her so that she can find someone else? <Seems like the only way...but RELI RELI RELI I don't wanna loose her... :-(( >
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Euphemism
It's a really hard choice, Innocent... you'll find a compendium of discussions on the subject in this thread
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talesin
should I make up a dumb excuse and leave her so that she can find someone else?
Yes.
I'm gonna take a long shot here, and suggest that you are dazzled by her innocence and virginity.
*sexy baby gurl* says a lot.
BTW, what would be your ages?
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Innocent_By-Stander
Respectfully I wana say.. F *(restrains himself)*... Listen to me well now, I'm NOT "dazzled by her innocence and virginity", if I wanted to "be" with a virgin I could have been with many already...but thats not the point. How CAN YOU assume that of me? Are you a JW ? As STATED above if you have read the posts... We are both 18. BTW Thanx Euphemism for posting da link, I'm gona go check it out...