Silly boy... lol Do Not Resuscitate
J
by nicolaou 56 Replies latest social physical
Silly boy... lol Do Not Resuscitate
J
Silly is my middle name.
I don't plan on dying.
GBL (of the 'Millions now Living Will Never Die' class)
I've thought about death a lot. Although I have no legal documentation (I know, I know), my NOK is aware of and in agreement with, DNR orders.
As far as fearing death is concerned, I would have to say NO, I do not fear death.
I've had three brushes; two were car accidents, one was a miscarriage.
Car accident would be my preferred way to go. I didn't even know I was hit till I woke up in the ambulance and hospital. If my head wasn't so damn hard, I would have just been here one minute, gone the next.
The third incident was the one I found fascinating. I was 'bleeding out' and I could actually feel the strength draining from my limbs. I was starting to get all spacy, the pain was lessening (and that is ALL I cared about at that point), I could only hear the doctor's voice sounding farther and farther away. I was ready to close my eyes and just go away from the pain and misery that was life.
Then I looked into my partner's face, and knew I could not leave him. So I began to fight inside, I began to feel the pain, I willed my body to stop bleeding. Well, I guess the emergency surgery didn't hurt, either. heheh
But my point, there was no fear. It was only for the love of someone else that I did not embrace the sweet eternal slumber that nite.
For me, FMZ was right; it is not death I fear, but life --- it's just so damn hard!
t
didn't you ever consider the possibility that you might be killed in a car wreck or something like that before Da Great Tribble-ation came around?
Of course Dan-O, but as a faithful JW I'd just wake up in Paradise - honestly, I really believed that. Death wouldn't have been final, that's "what's so different about it now" - the complete finality of it, non-existence, nothing.
It would be nice to feel like jeanniebeanz and so many others and believe that there was some better place waiting for me and my family but I am not inclined to swap one delusion for another [no offence].
You live, you die. Either side of that there is nothing.
It would be nice to feel like jeanniebeanz and so many others and believe that there was some better place waiting for me and my family but I am not inclined to swap one delusion for another [no offence].
None taken, Bub. But what I said was "if" there was something better waiting that'd be cool. I'm not too sure of that these days.
J
I expect I'll probably be 'dead cool' about it!
jkhvkjhv
Talesin dear, your post was very moving.
I know little sister that depression can make even the little things in life seem heavy. However, as we have discussed before, there is a doorway in your sensitivity. There are feelings within screaming for you to befriend and commune with them. We may interpret them as bad or even evil, but from my experience, that is not at all the case.
Answer the call; meet them and find what is at their Core. What is true? What are they trying to tell you? Don't judge them just be still and go deeper.
My teacher told me once regarding the agony of depression: "Stop running. This is not a demon chasing you as you have for so long thought. But rather -- the Christ".
I feel you will sense what I mean. Wouldn't say this to everyone.
j
I've simply come to realize that no one really knows what happens to us when we die. It's all just speculation. So I'll live my life to the fullest and try and be a good person. Maybe I will be rewarded in the end, and maybe not. Either way I'm glad to be here now, and I'm glad to be free of the lies the society filled my head with.