Karly:
I used to wonder that myself. I wondered how people could be so POPULAR. How did they do it? What did they say? What did they do? I was a social being just DYING to get out. I even read Dale Carnegie's books to try to find out what made people LIKE you. I was a lonely little JW girl, very sociable, just dying to hang out with people. I used to pray to Jehoover, every night, that he would make people like me. Little did I know that people liked me, but they couldn't relate to me because I was too scared to respond to them. I was always scared they would hurt me.
Later, in my life, I learned that the defensive actions I was taking were not conducive to friendship, and that I was always very defensive, and people instinctively knew that. When I finally understood the dynamics of it all, it changed.
These are the things I learned that help one to become a friend to others, and others will be attracted to:
Find what appeals to you. Pursue it with a passion. You will meet people that feel the same way you do.
Don't lie. Be honest about yourself and your past. People will come to trust what you say, and in turn, you can trust who they are.
Develop an interest in the people you meet. Everyone has a story, and you can learn from that, and you should always learn what you can for your own life, and help people with theirs.
Always remember small details about people. You may not remember their name, but you can always remember some detail about them. They appreciate it, and love it, that you remembered that. It's so unique when someone we meet remembers a small detail, but it's very endearing.
Always be positive. Although we are here on this group, sometimes, to express our bad feelings about the WTBS, that gets old. It's sometimes nice to read a good post and people remember you for that.
Be yourself. People can sense a fake person, and will ridicule one. Just be yourself.
I hope these small things I have learned over the years will help you.
CG
I lear