Dad (elder) called yesterday. (page 2)

EvilForce

Since they are not above using family pressure to screw you over....do unto others. Until he can talk to you in a civil manner he will not see his grandchild....Nuff said. No negotiating. Otherwise you will just be teaching your son that highly conditional love is ok.

Spook

I assert that love is complete acceptance without judgement. If you want that, you must give it. This has made a world of difference for me with my family and friends since I left. They know that I completely accept them and that they are safe in my hands. If you can give them that, then you will have your life.

AlmostAtheist

Poor you! Sorry you have to go through this stuff. My mother-in-law refused to call our house until I would agree not to answer the phone if I saw it was her.

Gina and I use their treatment of me (and to a lesser extent, of Gina) to innoculate our son against JW's. He's convinced that no religion that teaches parents to shun children is a good one. He's almost 7, Sierra's only 7 months. When she's a little older, we'll explain to her why grandma won't talk to me and help her to see what JW's (and other cults) can do to a person.

Dave

Chia

This is so sad Es. Especially since he's an elder he probably wants to hold back for the sake of his privileges. I've already determined that when I get married and have children, my mom is only going to know at the last minute.

willyloman

What Blondie said.

The time may have come to tell the whimpering coward that his decision to be ill mannered towards you means he's lost the privilege of any relationship with his grandson and that when he learns to be polite and civil towards others, you will reconsider.

BluesBrother

Poor Es, i can try to understand how you must feel . Of course I am not you and i am not a Mum. Perhaps I can see where your father is coming from. Is he a meticulous elder that follows the rules? He certainly seems to be determined to follow the rulebook in this instance.

The "Society" say that he must have no contact - so he does not do so. He is allowed to speak to his grandson. No doubt he has a strong desire to see you both, but his rule bound conscience won't let him. He does not allow himself to hardly "say a greeting" . I am sure that he hopes that this will force you to 'repent' and return to the Organisation . (backward reasoning but sometimes it seems to work)

Another example where the borg rules people to such an extent that they suppress the normal family desires for fellowship with loved ones . He loses out - he is the victim

I feel for you as well.

JamesThomas

Dear ((Es)),

In agreement with Spook.

I can not imagine that your father is not torn inside. Often the wisdom of "do unto others as we would have them do unto us", is a simple touchstone that allows for a sense of peace with no regrets.

I suggest being the person you wish your dad was. Love him no matter how much of a jerk he acts like.

It's so easy to love those who give kindness and love back; but there is little special about that. Love shines brightest when it is lit in darkness.

If your unconditional love can not reach him, nothing ever will

j.

The Thinker

But the Watchtower doesn't breakup families !!!!!!!! what BS. ! Its amazing what a hold false religion has on people. Its a dangerous thing when someone really beleives they are doing God's will, it makes them fly planes into buildings, turns themselves into suicide bombs, and at the very least makes them abandon their families. You should try somehow to show him what a false religion the WT really is, I think it will be the only way he'll ever change. Jesus said "there will come a time when they will put you to death and beleive they are doing a Scared thing" I feel that JW's who shun their families are forefilling this Prophesy, after all, to them you are like your dead, thank God that burning at the stake is against the law of the land or else there'll be pills of wood outside most KH's.

Ellie

I feel for you I really do.

It just seems like JW constantly let themselves down, I mean, doesn't it say somewhere something along the lines of 'By there actions you will know them'?

Can't they see the way they act is dispicable.

Es

Thanks so much everybody for your great replies i love you sooo much and consider you guys way more like family than my real one. The fact is i am not D\F so my father has no real reason not to speak to me. But like his usual behaviour he acts like a child and refuses to see where he is in the wrong. He is not a father in my eyes.....a father should always be there for there children no matter what....a father should have the maturity to accept when they are wrong and not act like a child. The fact that he is willing to put the org ahead of me even to the ridiculous point of not letting me borrow his cds for my wedding is pathetic and somewhat hurtful but he always makes his position know that if i eva D\A he would not talk to me and encourage my mother to do the same. I actually did send my D\A letter off and it got dismissed coz the body of elders thought I was just trying to get back at my dad :(. I dont know being a parent myself has made me realise how dissapointed i am in my parents thanks once again es

Dad (elder) called yesterday.

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