Recently deleted as elder

by TheListener 40 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  rebel8

  an exciting BOE meeting

  ??? What's that?
• 

  JAVA

  So far noone has said a word to me about it at the hall. It's really odd, like they're afraid to ask me about it. Don't get me wrong, they all say hi, how ya' doin'; they just don't go any deeper.

  Listener -- I stepped aside as an elder many years ago, and fully understand what you're doing. It's a funny feeling being an elder one day, and not the next. Folks don't know how to treat you or what to say, and as a result, they typically don't say anything. That seems to be what you're experiencing.

  When I did slow fade, only one elder stopped by for a visit--only one! However when my JW spouse turned me in for voting, they couldn't wait to have a little meeting. The one idiot said, "Brothers and sisters still speak so highly of you, and we can't allow that to continue." So don't be surprised if you don't see or hear much from the elders or others, because they don't know what to do or how to act when someone does what you're doing.
• 

  ljwtiamb

  LittleToe: I took the radical step of DA'ing myself at the end of my last Public Talk.

  I hate to deviate from the topic of this thread, but is your story out there somewhere? If not, please tell me the details. That is incredibly interesting to me!
• 

  ljwtiamb

  As bad as it initially seems, you will find that a sizeable load has been lifted off your shoulders.

  It may actually take a while for the cong. to stop treating you like an 'elder'. For several years, friends would confide in me and I would stop them from revealing too much, by reminding them that I was not on the BOE.

  Eventually the whole thing slows down though, and you can start enjoying life. I can honestly say that I did not enjoy the jws until I dumped that load of elder crap. It was GREAT being an regular 'joe' for a change. In time, I stopped viewing everyone by title: pioneer, publisher, ms, elder, co, do, gb, bethelite, etc. Either you were a friend or NOT. Every so often, I get introduced as: This brother WAS our wt study conductor and he used to be at bethel. It drives me CRAZY!

  Anyways! It is a shame that they only clap when you get appointed, but the real applause should come when you step down and leave.

  Best wishes!
• 

  Chia

  Listener, you're so brave. To go from an extremely high profile position in the congregation to where you are now definitely must be difficult. Thumbs up, definitely.
• 

  XBEHERE

  I am VERY happy for you. I hope to be doing the same in the near future. I may come to you for suggestions and support if you are willing.
• 

  LongHairGal

  Little Toe:

  My hat is off to you for DAing yourself on the podium. I have fantasies about doing that. Wow! People must have been sitting there with their mouths open!

  As far as anybody else who steps down as an elder, don't be offended if people say "oh, he was deleted because of ......" because rumors like that will spring up.

  Hopefully, your health will be better because usually men who become elders age rapidly. They all go gray pretty quick!
• 

  xjw_b12

  Listener. It must be such a release for you. Hope it continues to go well for you.

  Java said.

  Brothers and sisters still speak so highly of you, and we can't allow that to continue."

  I would have punched the bastard right in the mouth.
• 

  Honesty

  I adjudged that getting myself off of the radar was going to be nigh on impossible. Whichever way you go is a two edged sword. I got a quick and painful release (like removing a bandaid) and then closure. I also lost my family. Whichever way you go, there are high stakes and inevitable risks. I take my hat off to everyone who does what THEY feel THEY have to do, after coming to a knowledge of the truth about the "troof". LT

  I'm with LT on this one. I tried the fade but it was impossible to do.

  I took drastic measures also and experienced the quick and painful release at an extremely high price. Either way you go is going to be painful but you can do it. You have already taken the first steps to freedom from the Lie.
• 

  Chia

  I just read Java's quote. You're right about that. It must make them sick to know that people can do well outside of the org, even better than they did while in. Of course they wouldn't want anyone to know that. God forbid that info gets out. Why would anyone stay in? So they've got to pick and find something they can discipline/kick you out for. Really loving.