Father SHUNNED his daughter after becoming a JW ?????????????????

notjw

This was 10 yrs ago shes now almost 16 and very confused , her father wont call her or talk to her and hasnt had any contact with her . is this right >???? I heard it was a sin for them to do that . He remarried and adopted his new wifes child a bastard with NO DAD and disowed his only child . She wants closure and wants to be adopted by her new step dad . she wants to divorce her real dad the JW , DO YOU BLAME HER ? This is not right and he will burn in Hell for what hes put her through . Hes been in the JW FOR 10 YRS ........

HELP ME PLEASE UNDERSTAND SHE DIDNT DO ANYTHING TO HIM !

hubert

No, she didn't do anything to him. It's not her fault at all.

It's some of the stupid doctrine teachings of the Watchtower Society, which is head of J.W.'s.

I have never been one, so I can't explain it as good as others here will. I'm sure you'll get lots of replies on this question.

Welcome to the board, by the way. Stick around and learn all you can about the j.w. cult.

Hubert

Elsewhere

This is the norm for JW families... my entire JW family shuns me because I am not a JW.

blondie

First there are 2 factors involved here. While many fathers, JW and non-JW, stay in touch with their non-custodial children, some (too many) do not. Having worked in the child support/enforcement area for about ten years, it was sad to see how some drop the children from the first marriage, as if they want to cut all contact with the ex-wife.

Second, the WTS does not officially encourage or support the shunning of non-custodial children by their JW parent. Rather they play the manipulation game telling the parent that their non-custodial child's only hope of making it into the new system, is by that parent's keeping contact and trying to talk to their child about the Bible (actually WTS doctrine).

Can JW parents place the blame on the non-JW custodial parent for their lack of contact with the non-custodial child? Of course, because the elders aren't going to check out her/his story. If she really wants contact with her father, she should write a nice letter to him and blind carbon copy the elders in his congregation (mail to the KH address, attention the Presiding Overseer).

Sorry to hear of this situation.

Blondie

notjw

THANK YOU

notjw

OMG Your whole family ? Im so sorry , well they alll are gonna BURN thats all I have to say

notjw

well my daughter worte a letter to her dad alright and we also posted flyers all over the cars in the kingdom hall parking lot sunday .lol

blondie

That will get their attention but not in a positive way. JWs love adversarial attacks; it makes them seem right and the victim. We can't make people love us by demanding it. Believe me, as a child of divorce and a father who shunned his children and lied about it to others, I know.

Is there a neutral third party that could act as a go-between?

Blondie

hubert

notjw, why don't you start by telling us a little about yourself, and your daughters situation?

It'll be easier for us to help you with it, this way.

Hubert

blondie

A few questions and clarifications:

You are the ex-wife (first wife) and she is your daughter with him.

He has had no contact with her since she was 6; has he been allowed contact during all this time? (just asking)

Has he been paying child support during this period if he is required to?

From the flyer comment, can I assume that he and she live in close proximity?

I do suggest that regardless of the circumstances, for her sake, it would be good to calm down a little and realize that if she wants him to terminate his parental rights so her stepfather can adopt her, based on his alledged noncontact, I would think he would be agreeable to severing that legal attachment.

It does sound like she wants a relationship but then at the same time wants to separate herself (divorce) permanently from him.

Just be careful that your own feelings toward your ex-husband don't affect your daughter. My parents used us children to hurt each other long after the divorce. It's been 35 years and they still try; we won't let them.

hubert, is right that we don't have much info to go on.

Blondie

Father SHUNNED his daughter after becoming a JW ?????????????????

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