A substantially higher rate of marriage problems when compared to the general population.
Which for me lead to suicide attemps after I considered homocide.
Do JWs Actually Have Less of a Divorce Rate Than Other Religions???
by minimus 31 Replies latest jw friends
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BrendaCloutier
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jgnat
I think divorcing JW's result in one or the other not being JW any more. My guess is the rate of divorce (no matter how vehemently marriage is defended in the KH) is about the same as the general population. Here's an interesting article.
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upside/down
You obviously haven't been to SoCal....
Everyone was boinkin everyone and divorce was rampant!
What sucked was the jilted mate usually got so disgusted with their adulterous mate and the treatment by the "brothers' at large that they would leave and go find a "worldly" chick who wasn't afraid to give head and leave the bOrg....
only to have onlookers all say... we knew he was never "right" or "see J revealed his true heart condition"....
While embracing the adulterous mate and welcoming her/him back with open arms.... blaming the adultery on the innocent mate... after all see he left and went back to the vomit of the world....
These people SUCK!!! (and not in the "good" way)
u/d
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Elsewhere
These people SUCK!!! (and not in the "good" way)
As Bart Simpson once said: I didn't know it was physically possible, but that both sucks and blows!
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Sparkplug
"right" or "see J revealed his true heart condition"....
upside down--I must agree with you this morning. I have seen so many including self that had exactly the scenario you describe and the mate that is the putz is welcomed back into the "fold".
I always thought that it is so ironic the JW's preach of weeding the bad ones out and in fact they miss that the bad ones are weeded out and the place they are stored and deposited at is right in the middle of the congegation. The bad indeed are sorted and the good people with real heart and not so coniving are the ones that loose all of the family and friends they had. I think if...IF... there were any truth to the ""right" or "see J revealed his true heart condition"...." that indead the heart condition has been seen and the people with good heart conditions are set free from the JW's.
Sarcastically, of course, we should all be thankful for the eye opening wool being pulled off of our eyes and the bit of "only the strong survive"... For most everyone who post here have indeed learned some of the hardest lessons that can be learned by people. It is amazing the love and wisdom and genuine heartfelt feeling the people of this board have....most of them...
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Gill
You should meet my parents!
They've been trying to kill eachother for the last forty odd years!
They constantly verbally intimidate and abuse eachother very nastily!
They don't separate or divorce because, 'What would people think!'
What boggles my mind is that they stay JWs because they will be living forever.....TOGETHER!!!!!!
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minimus
Gill, your parents are probably considered "fine examples" in the congregation.
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Mary
Very few couples got divorced, even after they were caught with another person.I know that MOST that got df'd for straying still didn't get divorced----they tried to work it out.
I know many, many Witnesses who are absolutely miserable in their marriage, but they don't divorce. Why? The most compelling reasons are:
- The only scriptural grounds for divorce is adultery. That means that one of you has to commit adultery, which of course then means you either get PR'd or DF. If you want to stay in the religion, this is a tough pill to swallow. Plus if you commit adultery, it greatly affects your entire family and social club as everyone takes sides and blames the adulterer, even if their spouse was making their life a living hell. Therefore, many Dubs just carry on in their miserable marriages.
- The other reason more Witnesses don't get divorced is because alot of the wives have never worked outside the home and they have few, if any skills for today's workforce which would enable them to support themselves. They all get married as teenagers and go from having their parents look after them to having a husband look after them. So needless to say, when most marriages start getting nasty after about 10 years of marriage and a couple of kids, a woman who's in her late 20s or early 30s with no work skills, children to support and the family/social structure of her world that will be ruined if she gets a divorce, it's not surprising that they just carry on in a miserable marriage.
This is why the Society unofficially encourages people to get married when they're still really young. It means that you won't get any more education, you'll have a couple of kids and down the road if you're unhappy---too bad, you're stuck. It all help to promote the myth that Jehovah's Witnesses are the happiest people on earth.
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talesin
I have noticed that some exJWs carry this 'save-the-marriage-at-any-cost' attitude with them into the next phase of their lives, and continue on w/ the misery of a bad union (not that there is anything wrong w/ that *see seinfeld*).
tal
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BrendaCloutier
The other reason more Witnesses don't get divorced is because alot of the wives have never worked outside the home and they have few, if any skills for today's workforce which would enable them to support themselves. They all get married as teenagers and go from having their parents look after them to having a husband look after them. So needless to say, when most marriages start getting nasty after about 10 years of marriage and a couple of kids, a woman who's in her late 20s or early 30s with no work skills, children to support and the family/social structure of her world that will be ruined if she gets a divorce, it's not surprising that they just carry on in a miserable marriage.
I'm so grateful that tis is not a trap I fell into in the 70's. Even though I got married young at 18, I got on the pill and refused to have kids until 5 years into the marriage whe we should have had a house and stability. Instead, 5 years in, we were still renting, husband had a great job, and I was working then, too. But our marriage was so violent that there was no way I was going to bring a kid into THAT.It was because I was working, and I was the primary bill payer (husband saved and spent his money on his toys) that I realized that I could make it on my own. This, as I said above, after considering homocide and atempting suicide because I didn't believe in divorce. I learned to believe in it!
I look at my parents, and I see that my dad was happy all of those years, and my mom, the caretaker of the family, was miserable. My dad went to work, and brought home the paycheck. My mom raised 4 children, cleaned house compulsively, cooked, managed the budget, and entertained on occasion, only after supercleaning an already spotless house. They are also of an age and era that divorce was uncommon anyway.