I'm at square one today. Right now. After all of this time developing, talking, working, etc. I am looking at myself from outside of myself and seeing a person at square one.
The thing is, I feel quite good about realising that I'm here, at this point. Its almost like "the only way is up". Today is the first day of the rest of my life. I'm going to change.
Littletoe said in another thread that when he left JWs " I dropped my former life like a shroud and rose like a phoenix from the ashes". That one phrase made me realise I where I am and what it is possible to do. I've been under the shroud for so long, standing still, never actually moving away from it and leaving it all behind.
I wonder if it is normal to suddenly realise this? Who else here has thought they were moving forward only to realise they'd been standing still for years? I'm almost amused at how arrogant I've been.
Of course this relates in part to my recent thread on my depression.
So thanks Ross for posting that phrase - instead of the void I suddenly have a feeling - the feeling of hope.
Sirona