Dear Chloe,
That is a tough situation. Unfortunately, I have had to deal with this when a very close friend got addicted to cocaine. I will never forget that first night. He was in the office on the floor, scared to death. Someone had convinced him to snort a few lines and it made him sicker than hell. It was at a party, and he and I were the only ones left, everyone had gone home. When I found him on the floor, I didn't know what was going on. He was near tears and shaking violently. He begged me to stay with him and I did. I sat with him all night. He kept saying "hide the plate, hide the plate", but I didn't know what he was talking about. After searching a bit, I found a plate with coke and 2 straws. I hid it all right. I dumped the coke in the toilet and flushed it.
After that night, he started doing coke every once in a while, and every time he was very sick. I cried, I swore, I begged, I threatened him, and every time he promised me it would be the last time and he would not do it again. But he did, and he started doing it more and more. Fast forward to 3 years later.. he lost his business and went in debts to sustain his coke habit. he kept denying it to himself, kept telling himself that he was an occasional user. Truth is, it was ruling his life, destroying him and his family. He ended up losing everything. He lied to himself and to everyone else until he finally came to a point where he realized what it had done to him. I knew when he was at that point, I could see the change in him. Unfortunately, he was so addicted by then that he couldn't stop. He started doing it less frequently, but he kept 'slipping' about once every 3 weeks. He would snort and snort, and stay up for days on end without any sleep.
He really wanted to quit but he could not. Every time he 'slipped', he would be extremely depressed over it. He'd come over and literally cry and cry and cry.. Although I have never done cocaine or any other drug for that matter, I have come to hate it with an incredible passion. He has now been clean for 3 months, the longest he has been without it since that first night, but I'm still scared, because it is everywhere and everoyone offers it.. Finding coke around here is as easy as going to the store and buying a loaf of bread.
The only suggestion I have for you is to educate yourself on the subject (meth in your case), as much as you can. You cannot help an addict, that much I know. Until they are ready to help themselves, there is not much you can do. I'm so sorry but that's the way it is. Whatever you do, do NOT enable him. Often, when things were at their worst, my friend would come over and tell me how sorry he was about all this. I'd never accept his apology. I'd say clean up your act and then apologize. As long as you're doing that shit, don't waste your breath apologizing, because you are just going to turn around and do it again. Then he would say that I was his only friend and if he couldn't get support from me then he would not get it from anyone. I'd answer that I'd not be a friend if I consoled, it would not help him.
I am crossing my fingers.
