no one to talk to (page 2)

garybuss

Welcome! I hope ya take the time to look at theism itself someday. That ended a lot of the post exit issues in my mind. I gotta say it did help to honestly face my parents with my real opinion of the Witness group, though that in fact ended our already fragile rapport.

clementine

hi Jeeves! and welcome! don't worry, your feelings are totally normal after the hurting dub experience... i used to have some of them, and i still have others... it takes time to rebuild, that's the only thing to say. but if you have the will, you'll never regrett it later on, because this world is not as they say, and living here can be great, i assure you!! ;-)) don't hesitate posting if you feel the need of it, take care ps : here, you'll always find "someone to talk to":-)

greendawn

Welcome Jeeves I am sure you will find many threads on this board helpful in shaking off the spell of the WTS and it's always good to vent feelings.

chrissy

Hey Jeeves!

I was talking about this very thing with a friend of mine recently. We both have had to do some figuring out in the whole area of developing new meaningful female/male relationships after a lifetime of insta-friends. It has been challenging, but we both agreed on one thing: with the friendships that we now make in the world it is reassuring to know the other parties are drawn to us and our personalities out of a genuine interest in who we are. Not out of any “christian” obligation.

By the way...welcome girl.

Tez

Have got to agree with a lot of the other comments on here. I am still floundering, have this need to post mortem the last 22 years of my life, and not many understand, which is why i have come on here. In addition though, can't say even as a JW i felt that i had 'real' friends. Always felt that whatever i said or did would be judged or criticised, so couldn't really open up and talk about anything and everything to folk. Persevere with this site, i intend to.. I have had a lot of lovely replies to the introduction my son made for me!! and hope that in time i can be of support and help to others on here.

Take care, it will all come right in the end!!!

Swan

Welcome Jeeves!

It looks like you have come to the right place.

Tammy

GetBusyLiving

:Always felt that whatever i said or did would be judged or criticised, so couldn't really open up and talk about anything and everything to folk.

Ain't that the truth. 28 years of censoring myself. If you make the effort to make at least one new friend every month its surprising how much better you can feel about the world.

GBL

love2Bworldly

Welcome! Understand your feelings as I left the JWs when I was 22ish and had no 'worldly' friends. I've come out of my shell--used to be very shy, and it's become easier to make friends. I've only been on the forum for a couple months, but really enjoy meeting the people here through the computer. Hope to meet some in person some day.

Rod P

Yes, you do have lots of people to talk to. They are right here on this forum.

You are not alone.

And you are understood in terms of what you are going thru on the JW thing. The collective experience and wisdom on this forum will help you to develop some perspectives on your own experiences, and with time and patience, you will come to understand things much more than you perhaps do right now.

In the meantime, it is important that you do not get into a "blame game" or "guilt trip" on yourself for feeling the things you do. I say this because there are lots of JW's around who would try to reinforce that on you. If you do not buy into it, then it cannot have power over you.

This is all part of the JW programming that has moulded your thinking and feelings for so long, and is the reason they have had such control over you, same as the rest of us. You are not wrong for feeling the way you do, nor are you abnormal.

There is definitely life after JW. There are some very nice people out there in the "world". You just haven't met them yet. Allow yourself to meet a few along the way. There is no hurry, and you can go at your own pace, or as you feel ready and willing. Over time you can begin to rebuild your life with some real alternatives, and then you won't have to feel so alone or isolated. For example, think about what you are interested in, such as a hobby. Then seek out some group that shares that same interest. That is a good way to start to meet people and make new friends. But again, there is no need to rush into anything. This is all about doing your own thing as you feel ready.

If you are feeling like you are really floundering on your own, I would recommend that you pursue some kind of counselling. Governments usually have available some very good professional counsellors who can objectively, one-on-one, identify some of the problem areas, provide you with insights on what you are going thru, and advise you on some useful tools and strategies you can adopt to help you create new and better alternatives, instead of being stuck in the past. The objective is to help you to manage your day to day life, and to move on towards a better, more positive and constructive future. (I am telling you this, because I needed help once, and went thru this process, and have no regrets about it. I discovered things about myself I did not know before, which really helped.)

All the best in your future endeavors, and remember, anytime you want to come here and express your feelings and viewpoints, you are alway welcome.

Rod P.

no one to talk to

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