This little incident cracked me up, thought I'd share...
We live in a decent neighborhood in Suburbia, nearly all of the houses are owned, people mow their own lawns, (well everyone except US!) two or three cars per family, dogs, kids, etc. We also have an extremely lax neighborhood association that never enforces anything. You can put a 12 foot satellite dish on your roof, park a 40ft motorhome on the street and your yacht on the front lawn, and they might get around to asking you to use the RV lot sometime in the next decade.
We get a LOT of door-to-door salesmen, solicitors, and the like coming through the neighborhood. As you can imagine, the HOA doesn't really do much about this. They're probably off towing their YACHT with their 40 ft motorhome...
One thing I notice is that ALL of these people ring the doorbell. *BING BONG* Oh yeah, the JWs come around about once every two years. Actually they are in our neighborhood quite often because someone has a return visit on the lady 3 doors down. Don't worry, she's in no danger of converting.
Now, some of these people I like, and some of them are just annoying. There is a DD guy who comes around a few times a year with a 5 gallon bucket full of jars of the best honey ever, beeswax candles and crafting beeswax. I always buy his stuff. I ALWAYS buy from the kid's elementary school fundraisers, and I like the OSPIRG kids too. I frequently learn something about local enviromental issues if I talk to them.
We also get more than our fair share of preachers. About half are there to solicit money for their programs, (I'd imagine some of these are legit, some I know are not.) Sometimes we have LDS come through, I don't talk with them, and more often than not it's a smaller church knocking on doors offering "free bible study courses," or "free vacation bible days."
Yesterday, about 1pm, my F/T Pioneer JW mother called on the phone. At the same time I answered, *BING BONG* I went to the door, answered it and this black guy in a Raider's jacket, (remember I live in Suburbia... let me amend that... WHITE suburbia...) launched into his "testimonial." It went something like this:
"Yea, though I was los' ta drugs and booze, Ah' come unto da Lawd, and he SAVE me from my dark paf. Ah'm heah too-day collectin' fo' da ministry we do wif folk jus lak me, tryin' ta escape da life of sin and deebauchery! We do a git clean shelter, and hope dat generosity from da Lawd will motivate you TOOday to gib from yo' heart abundance! Lemme read you a text from da Lawd...." blah blah blah
Anyways, my mom is on the line listening to this spiel, so at that point I told her I'd call her back. I hung up, with great difficulty disengaged myself from this master performer... still not sure about the "clean from the drugs" thing. LOL.
So... I called my pioneer mom back. I decided to really muddy the waters. You know how the JWs are always going on and on about how they are the ONLY ONES doing the preaching work... conversation went like this:
Me: Hiya mom!
Mom: Who was that at the door
Me: Preacher, we get them ALL the time through here. Every few weeks.
Mom: Well, they're just looking for money.
Me: That one was, but mostly they just offer free bible study courses or read scriptures.
Mom: Well what church was he from?
Me: I don't know, he didn't leave a tract. Mostly they leave a tract or a magazine...
Mom: *LONG silence* Well, we NEVER get anyone knocking on our door. (because of course, she's insinuating that there IS no one else who does ministry)
Me: Ah, your apartment manager must do a better job of running them off before they get to your door.
Mom: *more silence*
LMAO!!! Just thought it was funny.
O
Other Preachers at my door!
by Odrade 10 Replies latest jw friends
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Odrade
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luna2
LMAO! Poor Mom. Not a whole lot she could say to that, huh?
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katiekitten
My dad lives in Miami Dade and he says they come round trying to find spanish speakers only. They knock the door ask you if you speak spanish and arent interested if your not hispanic / cuban. (correct me if im wrong, im only repeating him, I dont actually know this for myself).
I quite like the idea of a dub getting hold of your door handle and closing your own door on you while saying 'im sorry im not interested in you'.
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Euphemism
LOL, Odrade! Especially at the transcription...
Katie... for all I know, that could have been the Witnesses. Foreign-language congregations will sometimes do 'surveys'... by which they mean, just knocking on doors looking for people who speak their language.
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drwtsn32
LOL...too funny. I have been in my house for four years now and only once has someone come by..and it was to invite people in the area to a nearby church. Just said "no thanks" and he left.
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carla
I put up sign on my door- NO SOLICITING OF ANY KIND- religious, youths dumped in suburbs, book sales, etc...
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Xandria
Orade:
I live in a secure building that kinda puts a kibosh on peddling like that. But, I have ran into people in the past, like that. I am nice, but when they get militant or extremely pushy.. then watch out!
I had two, in one year when we lived in AZ. They would not take no for an answer. One was very funny. He went on and on. Got mad when I wouldn't purchase anything and became abusive. Bad mistake since, I was watering the lawn at the time. Can anyone say drowned rat? There was not much he could do since he was on my turf, yelling and all the neighbors had come out to see WTH was going on.
Geez! you would have thought they were selling Amway.. (NOWAY!) products.
X.
X.
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Netty
This is too funny! The witnesses always like to BRAG about how they are the only ones doing the door to door preaching work. They sure hate hearing that anyone else could possibly be doing it too.
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Odrade
Ugh, my mom is now calling me three times a day! I don't know why... thought that conversation would have been enough to make her want to avoid me for a few days. LOL!
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Euphemism
Odrade... it's like the advice they used to give sisters who were being hit on by non-Witness guys... just keep anti-Witnessing to her until she leaves you alone!