I considered myself to remain a Jehovah's Witness for years after my exodus from the borganization, because I had no access to the internet until 1999 and though I had purposefully forced the governing haughty to df me in 1992. It wasn't that I had intentions of going back. It was because I was so inundated with disinformation from the teachings and practices of the witlesses.....and from almost constant study of the scriptures.
There were many strange and profound spiritual experiences and signs given to me which were leading me out of being borganized that I underwent before I finally accessed the internet and began having my eyes opened by websites such as this one. I did not segue into yet another religious medium, as so many have done, for I began realizing a great deal of disillusionment with what I had known, even that which I had thought was true before I was indoctrinated into the jdub cult......and I find now....that all religious beliefs, teachings and practices are just so much bunk.....and have been fostered by some ancient, control-freaky, power-hungry and chauvinistic horn-dogs. To me now, religion in any form is totally repugnant, though I normally manifest an ambivalence or tolerance about anyone else's religious preferences, as I respect others' right to choose whether they wish to be led about by a ring in their noses.
The oath that I took before baptism as a jdub was not the one they have now which binds the oath-takers to the borg. No, the one I took then was prior to the current one and only professed allegiance to Jehovah God and his son, Jesus Christ. So I did not actually become apostate according to the oath I took until I began to be disillusioned with the things I'd thought were true in the scriptures.....and with the God and his son that I'd learned to love and trust. After my eyes were opened on the internet, my whole outlook changed.
I took a test on a website not long ago. One that was posted here on JWD. I tested as a neo-pagan. (pagan >noun a person holding religious beliefs other than those of the main world religions.) I don't really hold with the "neo-" portion of that designation, but the pagan part isn't bad like I used to think. I used to think it was strongly related to atheism or devil-worship. It isn't necessarily. It's a non-religion designation sorta.
Sometimes, I wondered about all those powerful experiences and signs which I experienced pre-internet access. But I pretty much believe now that they were the result of OD-ing on the scriptures until I was experiencing a peculiar version of what I so strongly believed in at the time. After all....they dwindled and then screeched to a sudden halt when I got online and began to realize for whom and why the bible was created.
Frannie