Marriage Proposal: See Publisher Record Card First?

by Englishman 16 Replies latest jw friends

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  Englishman

  Anyone do this? Ask to see your intended one's Publisher Record Card before asking for their hand in marriage?

  As a younger man, I was counselled by our CO and his wife that such a thing was an essential act before agreeing to becoming engaged to marry anyone.

  I was actually engaged at the time. The CO told me that I had made a mistake in not checking out the sister's Record Card before becoming betrothed. He said that this was a normal thing for any mature person to request and he went on to express great surprise and disappointment that I had not done this.

  I replied that it wouldn't surely be right for a PO to make a persons record card available to a third party. The CO said that this was not the case and that any PO would be happy to do so if a proposal of marriage was in the offing.

  Seems a bit mercenary somehow.

  Englishman.
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  garybuss

  I know a few people who should have done a credit check.
  
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  JH

  In other words, you can't get married out of the truth, and if you want to get married in the truth, you better knock on doors regularly. Bottom line: No preaching, no sex.
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  blondie

  People are encouraged to ask the elders in that person's congregation if they are "spiritually" strong. The elders don't always tell the truth.

  I know of a sister who traveled half-way across the US to see a brother after she had called his BOE and was given the thumbs up. Upon arriving, she found out he had been convicted of child molestation. Morale of the story, do a cirminal background check as well as a financial check.

  In the US prospective mates can ask the person to take an AIDS test and if it is positive, they can back out of the engagement without any congregational sanctions.
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  stillajwexelder

  Bottom line: No preaching, no sex. LOL
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  greendawn

  This is something new to me and it is obviously another form of cultish control if your card doesn't show spiritual activity as defined by the WTS then you are low down or even off the desirability scale.
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  garybuss

  Bottom line: No preaching, no sex.
  That kind of puts a different slant to the donation arrangement, doesn't it?
  
  
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  seven006

  Since I was a stupid 19 year old clueless about life JW boy, when I married Satan’s sister (my ex-wife), the only way I would have looked at her publisher record card was if they taped it to her shapely little ass. Stupidity runs ramped in darkness of a close-minded cult and at 19 you just want to see someone naked without getting disfellowshipped. Compatibility with a possible mate is far down the priority list.
  
  
  
  
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  Frannie Banannie

  Englishman, in that case, it should be no problem for the BOE's to allow interested parties with kids to check out the publisher's cards to see who's been/being disciplined for child molesting or rape, eh?

  Frannie
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  Scully

  Bottom line: No preaching, no sex.
  
  That kind of puts a different slant to the donation arrangement, doesn't it?

  If you are out there preaching, isn't it true that the WTS is screwing you?