Female Prayer versus Male Prayer in 2005

by Sparkplug 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • Sparkplug
    Sparkplug

    FEMALE PRAYER FOR 2005:


    Before I lay me down to sleep,


    I pray for a man,


    who's not a creep,


    One who's handsome,


    smart and strong,


    One who loves to listen long,


    One who thinks before he speaks,


    One who'll call,


    not wait for weeks.


    I pray he's gainfully employed,


    When I spend his cash,


    won't be annoyed.


    Pulls out my chair and opens my door,


    Massages my back and begs to do more.


    Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,


    Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"


    I pray that this man will love me to no end,


    And always be my very best friend.


    Amen.






    MALE PRAYER FOR 2005:


    I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac


    with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a bass boat.


    This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit!


    Amen

  • googlemagoogle
    googlemagoogle

    LOL.

    nice one

  • unclebruce
    unclebruce

    LOL!

    Dearest Jehovah Huey (australian God of storms)

    ps: could my nympho come with a big belly button full of nachos & cream? .. and be quick about it .. I'm hungry

    serving meself, (in the biblical sense) unc

    ***

    ref: "SEND HER DOWN HEWY!" is a short australian prayer yelled to the sky when rain clouds approach.

  • greendawn
    greendawn

    That's a lovely poem sparkplug, that's an ideal man who has everything but I wonder what exactly this means: "Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"

  • googlemagoogle
    googlemagoogle

    "how big is my behind?"

    that's the "am i fat? i'm not fat, am i?" talk...

  • prophecor
    prophecor

    Careful what you pray for, Decki, you just might get it. Love is a wonderful thing, yes, but it comes, oftentimes at an astronomical cost. Mentally, spiritually, and physically. But when we find our space of comfortability, if we ever reach a point where we can bridge the gap of human vs. human, men are from Mars, women from Venus thing, but oh how sweet it can be when we learn each others language.

  • tijkmo
    tijkmo

    haha..i almost missed this..glad i dint

  • Sparkplug
    Sparkplug

    Prophecor. I am just messing... It was a funny!!

    The last kind of a prayer (If I were prone to do so) I would be saying is one that askes for a lot of what this woman asks for in this joke. See I wanted some of this stuff but it was like a twilight zone..so that it ended with a twist that was horrid. Therefore I really do not have a clue on how to ask for anything now. I think I just need to enjoy time when I have it and not be searching for anything in a way that may make anything happen because ...as you can say, "careful what you wish for." You just may get someone who would be utterly happy with a bass boat and a liquor store and that is ALL.

    Guys like that can disquise themselves for quite a bit and it is such a big let down when you see that that was all they needed to be satisfied. Quite embarrasing when you have dated...um er married a big boob like that and then have to live with the fact people will always know that. Anyone have a mind eraser?

  • heathen
    heathen

    Sparkplug --- are you saying you have a liquor store and a bass boat ?LOL I'm taking for granted you are not a deaf mute but possibly a nympho . One never knows ........

  • Legolas

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