New Special Ass'y Day and Circuit Assembly Themes for 2006 Service Year

by TheListener 19 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • Shania
    Shania

    Malleable, adj. readily shaped by hammering. Well isn't that a perfect discription of how the FDS use there powers: by hammering into the sheeps head, wow that word says alot--------I hope people at the assembly pay attention, or they might get hammered if you know what I mean.........oh excuse me, they are going to get hammered------------the Societies way------------beware all who attend------------------

  • JoeGeneration
    JoeGeneration

    4. How can parents and others encourage youths to pursue spiritual goals? ("Parents Who Airm Their Arrows Aright" and "Youths Who Reach Out for Spiritual Goals")

    Gone are the days when post-secondary education was to be allowed if deemed appropriate by a potential JW college student's family. According to WTS this decision was to be respected and not questioned by the rest of the congregation. You won’t here that line reiterated during any talks on spiritual goals vs educational.

  • rebel8
    rebel8

    same old, same old

  • Dimples
    Dimples

    How important is it to use our tongue aright?

    What is the most honorable use of our tongue?

    ummm... I guess I better not go there!

    DIMPLES

  • DanTheMan
    DanTheMan
    2. How have some increased their share in the preaching work?

    followed by:

    3. Why should we avoid comparing ourselves with others?

    LMAO!

  • loosie
    loosie

    1. How do we put on the new personality, and why must we maintain it?

    So that we look and act just like everyone else

    2. How have some increased their share in the preaching work?

    By using fuzzy math when filling out your service report

    3. Why should we avoid comparing ourselves with others?

    Yeah the elders compare you to others, that one usually doesn't get applied

    4. How can family members manifest the new personality within the family circle?

    By beatings inthe bathroom during the meeting

    5. How can we show loyal support within the congregation?

    By slipping the elders a $20 here and there

    6. Why do we need to display the new personality in the field ministry?

    So more people will buy magazines

    7. What does proper meditation include, and how do we benefit from such meditation?

    Yoga

    8. What qualities will make us malleable in Jehovah's hands?

    Being a submissive woman helps

    9. How important is it to use our tongue aright?

    We can't use our tongue aright, It isn't allowed

    10. What benefits come from using wholesome speech with workmates, schoolmates, and others?

    We look even more like a dweeb than usual

    12. What is the most honorable use of our tongue?

    The most hororable use is On your Spouse

    13. What must we do in order to conquer the wicked one?

    Stop donating money to him

    14. In what areas should we endeavor to remain without spot from the world?

    No blood spots on our hospital clothes

    15. Why must we daily renew the person we are inside, and how can we do so?

    By visiting JWD

    16. What counsel from this year's circuit assembly program are you planning to apply?

    none

  • lawrence
    lawrence

    Loosie - Excellent!

    I was thinking about assemblies:

    mind drain and brain fried, another meeting of crap and lies,

    diatribe to beat the sheep, second class sheep don't get relief;

    second class sheep don't even get a Jesus Kingdom Seat.

  • in a new york bethel minute
    in a new york bethel minute

    LMMFCO LOOSIE! that was some good shiat... very clever, albeit old personality of u

    bethel

  • Big Dog
    Big Dog

    With material like that you've got to wonder if by the end of the assembly the folks in the audience won't be drawing flies.

    Those titles are just too much. Who comes up with that tripe? Do a bunch of people actually sit around and say oh yeah, that' profound up there at Bethel? Do they have one functioning brain cell in the whole place?

  • JW83
    JW83

    I agree, same old, same old. How did we keep falling for this boring crap year after year?!

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