THE GARDEN OF EDEN
1. God created the world and two people named Adam and Eve, with whom he intended to populate the world.
2. One day, while God was not looking, the Devil came and captured Adam and Eve.
3. Adam and Eve were imprisoned in the Devil's garden called "Eden." God spoke to his eternal foe and asked for the return of his people. But the Devil, being fond of his new pets, refused.
4. God resolved to liberate Adam and Eve. Taking the shape of a serpent, God sneaked into the Devil's garden.
5. Sensing that Eve was the more insightful of the pair, God approached her.
6. God said to Eve, "If you will listen to me, I know a way for you to escape your imprisonment."
7. Eve said, "But Mr. Serpent, I do not wish to escape Eden. I like it here. This garden has everything I need."
8. God said, "You do not know what you are missing. Outside of this garden is an entire world, much larger than a mere garden. This world was created for your use. You will be much more satisfied there."
9. Eve said, "Really? I need to discuss this with Adam."
10. God said, "No, don't do that! Listen to me. In the far part of the garden there is a tree, called the Tree of Knowledge. Eat from this tree, and trick Adam into doing the same. Then you will know of the world at large, and your true mission in life."
11. And so Eve did as God asked. She and Adam ate from the Tree of Knowledge. They knew at once of the world outside and they were astonished to know how large and beautiful it was.
12. The Devil, sensing a disturbance, came into his garden to check on things. He was surprised to find that Adam and Eve had put on clothing and were building a boat out of fallen trees. He knew at once that they discovered the Tree of Knowledge.
13. The Devil was very cross. He spoke to Adam and Eve. "You think you are smart now! The world outside is not as grand as you think it is. In here - you are safe and taken care of. Out there - you must work and suffer."
14. Adam spoke. "We know of the world at large and our true potential. What you say may be true, but we do not want to live in a state of perpetual dependence. We are going to leave this garden and take our chances in the world."
15. Adam and Eve climbed into their boat and floated down river, exiting Eden.
16. The Devil began looking about his garden. By and by, he found a serpent that was not his own. The Devil spoke, "I see you now, God. I wish to confront you."
17. God resumed his natural shape. God and the Devil stood facing each other. God spoke. "Those people were my creation, and I intended to populate the world with them. You stole them from me and now I have stolen them back."
18. The Devil spoke. "You are clever God, but I am more clever still. Adam and Eve will populate the world, but once they have done this, I will find a way to turn their descendants into my servants."
19. God spoke. "You shall not succeed. I will place a part of myself inside of each new born child. This shall be called the "heart." The people of my world will never be separated from me - and they will never serve you."
20. "We shall see," said the Devil.
2. Adam and Eve parented many children and these children parented many more. By and by, the world became full of the progeny of Adam and Eve. God was pleased.
3. The Devil was not pleased. The success of his rival irritated him greatly. The Devil tried repeatedly to enslave the progeny of Adam and Eve but he was not successful.
4. Thwarting the Devil with every attempt was the heart, that part of God that existed inside of every person.
5. The Devil thought to himself, "It appears that the only way I can enslave these people is if I somehow convince them to stop following their own hearts. I must be crafty."
6. The Devil hatched a crooked plan. He took the form of a spirit and spoke to an impressionable man named Abraham.
7. "Listen to me, Abraham, for I am the Lord God," said the Devil. "All of humanity is born separate from me. But I have chosen your people to be my special people. I will teach you how to reunite yourselves with me." Abraham felt a rush of pride at having been chosen and he agreed to do the Devil's bidding.
8. For the following months and years the Devil instructed Abraham and his people. He taught them elaborate and absurd rituals. This the Devil knew, would keep their minds focused on external things and thus keep them from looking inside - where the heart dwelt.
9. The people of Abraham performed their rituals with great diligence. They believed that by performing rituals, they were uniting themselves with God. When in fact, they were separating themselves from God.
10. The Devil was pleased with his success. He searched the world and found other men like Abraham. Soon the world was rife with ritualism, and divided into hostile tribes.
1. God saw what the Devil was doing but he did not fret. For the heart, placed inside each person is not just the connection between God and humanity. The heart is also the source of inspiration and therefore creativity.
2. God knew that tribes who became ritualistic would also loose their ability to invent new things. These tribes would fall behind, and be conquered by other, more advanced tribes.
3. And so it came to pass that the Devil's primary weapon was ritualism and God's primary weapon was secularism. Some centuries, the Devil enjoyed the upper hand and some centuries God did.
4. The battle never did end. It goes on today much as it did in Abraham's time. The battle never will end either. It will go on and on, Ad Infinitum.
THE GARDEN OF EDEN
by WildTurkey 12 Replies latest watchtower bible
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WildTurkey
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hibiscusfire
That is so perverted.
HF
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tetrapod.sapien
nice!
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ezekiel3
Makes perfect sense to me!
Doesn't it seem odd that the Devil has been so successful turning both humans and angels from God?
At anytime in Bible history until now, the true believer are only an minute part of the population.
Maybe its the other way round -- or perhaps "God" and the "Devil" are in cahoots?
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hibiscusfire
That's crappy.
HF
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nilfun
Creative, out-of-the-box thinking...I like it, WildTurkey.
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Low-Key Lysmith
I like it!!!
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dorayakii
I have heard something like this before... its reminds me of Gnostic beliefs...
I used to look at Genesis and say:
"Well, Jehovah was the one lying here, not the snake, he said they would die that day... "
"Satan was telling the truth, that they would become like God and know good and bad... Its not much of a lie when what you say comes true... "
"In Gen 3:22 Jehovah admits that by saying "oh dear, they ate the fruit and have become like one of us knowing good and bad..." just like the Snake said... "
"If the tree was going to bring death, why was it called the Tree of Knowledge and not the Tree of Death..."
"And why was Jehovah still worried in Gen 3:22 that they might live forever by eating the Tree of Life, when he had already said they would die by eating the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge... "
Also, "why didn't Adam and Eve take from the Tree of Life first, THEN from the Tree of Knowledge?... we'd all be living forever with perfect knowledge"
If you read the book of Genesis from the Gnostic point of view, most things fall into place, and there are less moral inconsistencies.
YHWH Elohim (the evil God, the real Devil) created the world, that is why it is inherantly evil and flawed.
The benevolent but unknown and humble creator-goddess Sophia had created YHWH Elohim but in her imperfection make some kind of mistake.
YHWH Elohim created Adam in his own little world, Eden, but created him without a soul.
YHWH put Adam into a deep sleep in order to awaken him as a slave. However, Sophia, in her desire to correct the mistake she made with creating YHWH, sent Zoe/Eve to awaken him with her spirit.
As Eve enters into, then emerges from Adam, YHWH gives Adam the impression that Eve is taken from him and therefore inferior to him.
Adam and Eve continue together and begin to seek knowledge. YHWH tells them not to seek knowledge or they will die. Sophia (through the serpent) tells them to seek knowlege and become like God.
YHWH Elohim was lying when he said that Adam and Eve would die, they did not die on the day they ate from it no matter how Christians may argue that a day to Jehovah is 1000 years etc.
The snake (the benevolent but unknown and humble creator-goddess Sophia) was telling the truth when he said they would not die, and that they would become like God knowing Good and Bad. (After all, it was called the "Tree of Knowledge of Good and Bad")... In fact YHWH admits that the snake was telling the truth when in Gen 3:22 he says "Here the man has become like one of us in knowing good and bad, and now in order that he might not take fruit also from the tree of life and live to time indefinate -"... YHWH is afraid that the knowledge of the humans will free them from slavery.
(Gen 3:22 always bugged me as a JW... whats wrong with knowing good and bad? whats wrong with living to time infefinate with that knowledge?)
Therefore, Adam and Eve were therefore thrown out of the Garden of Eden by YHWH Elohim for seeking Knowledge, therefore making the serpent the hero of the story. (In fact, he Israelites worshipped the serpent in the form of the copper snake).
Death was not something that came about from a contamination of eating the fruit of Knowledge, it was a result of YHWH taking away the opportunity of eating the fruit of Life.
Adam and Eve did recieve Knowledge; their brains grew bigger which increased the pain of childbirth, (much bigger heads, marginally bigger hips for baby to slip through). Adam had to work hard with his new found knowledge, YHWH caused thorns and thistles to grow up, in order to occupy Adam with work, instead of using the knowledge he had aquired to better himself.
The creator-goddess Sophia came to earth in the form of a snake to free humanity and show them spiritual truths (the knowlege of good and evil).
It was YHWH Elohim who gave the Jews the Law (to keep them in line). The bible is a production of the evil God YHWH to keep people in subjection to ritual, to stop people thinking and to nullify the effects of the Knowledge that Adam and Eve recieved, by reducing truth to mere ritual and endless work.
When YHWH cursed the snake, Sophia had already left it, YHWH was showing his short temper by cursing the poor animal. YHWH Elohim is also "impious in his arrogance". He says things like, 'I am God and there is no other God beside me,' for he is "ignorant of his strength, the place from which he had come".
Jesus was an emissary of the creator-goddess who was sent to impart knowledge to the chosen few. Sophia, in the form of Jesus, told his/her disciples the true way to salvation: love everyone, and don't be bound by the law. Again he/she was humble, discreet.
The New Testament was only the mass-market version of what Christianity was supposed to be, again produced by YHWH, the evil God, in order to again enslave man to rutual, and stop him from thinking (using his knowledge). The NT again added more and more laws to the rules that were done away with in the gospels. It also included contained countless references the Satan the Devil showing that the NT writers were conducting a stepped-up propaganda campaign against this new enemy, the Original Serpent. *
* (Satan is referenced to only 5 times (only 2 times by name) in the large, vast Old Testament but he is referred to 72 times in the relatively tiny New Testament, http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/10/95743/1.ashx )...
See also http://www.essene.com/Gospels/GnosticAndSophia.html
“Both read the Bible day and night; but you read black where I read white."
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stillajwexelder
An man made God in his own image
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hibiscusfire
doray:
I used to look at Genesis and say:
"Well, Jehovah was the one lying here, not the snake, he said they would die that day... "
When God said that it was true. After Adam and Eve disobeyed God they started to die. They would have lived forever but they sinned against God. They started to get old. Eve had pain when she had her children. Adam had to toil in the garden. They both had to work. God said they would surely die and they did.
God did not lie.
Hibiscusfire