I see me.
Hibiscus
by findingmyway 16 Replies latest jw friends
I see me.
Hibiscus
at the moment i see someone who isnt me. The person i am at the moment isnt me....i think ive fallen back into depression a bit es
I see someone constantly struggling with life and wondering why have i been crapped on since i was born .
Es,
I have a constant battle with depression as well. Now that I no longer have my family to lean on, I'm starting to rebuild a support system. But it's hard starting from scratch when you don't even have a foundation anymore. I try not to get too lost in myself because I have an 8 year old that I have to care for and I need to be well for him. The last thing I want is for him to look back on his childhood and remember me as a sad mother. So whenever I am having an episode, I save my tears for my pillow and reserve them for the darkness of my room. My boy really keeps me going.
How are you coping?
I never looked in the mirror before. Oh yes, I would see a face that I applied makeup to, or hair that I combed, teeth that I brushed, but I had no 'image' of me in my mind. About a year ago, I realized that I was looking in the mirror and really seeing a person for the first time.
I looked into my eyes, and saw great pain and sorrow on most days, but on others, I saw joy, and a promise of the happy years to come. I examined my cheekbones, my nose, my lips, and saw what others had been seeing for years ... me. ;)
tal
I see now that I own this space.
I am