by GoingGoingGone 24 Replies latest jw friends
'What can I do to help you get back to meetings?'
I had someone ask me that once upon a time and I said: "Nothing. I've seen too many things going on at the Kingdom Hall that violate my conscience, and it's not a safe place to take my children." I got a beautiful "goldfish" look: goggling eyes and open mouth.
Nina
'What can I do to help you get back to meetings?'I had someone ask me that once upon a time and I said: "Nothing. I've seen too many things going on at the Kingdom Hall that violate my conscience, and it's not a safe place to take my children." I got a beautiful "goldfish" look: goggling eyes and open mouth.
Nina - That's hysterical! Some day I'm going to use that for sure.... !!
GGG
I got a beautiful "goldfish" look: goggling eyes and open mouth.
Hey, Nina - My goldfish told me to tell you they're insulted - especially the $90 one!
I've used the depression excuse before and it worked. It kept the elders off my back as I would tell them I am trying to get on meds that will work, etc. It was a load of BS though.
However, I like this reply:
"I know what it would take and I am working on it. As the Society says, my relationship with Jehovah is deeply personal and I am working through some things."
Best of luck to you. Keep us posted.
Purza
I'd thank her for her concern, and tell her you appreciate her friendship. Ask her when she can make time to come by for tea another day.
If she tries to redirect about the MEETING, ask her, since she is a direct kind of gal, "Is the only reason you came by was to get me to come to the MEETING? Is our friendship really that SHALLOW?" At that point, give direct eye contact, even reach out and pat her hand.
And, yes, have a list ready of topics in common for redirect. Reminisce if you have to, of good times. I am sick of talking to JW clones. It's way more fun to talk to the real people underneath.
Ok all!! Thanks so much for the advice... Here's the update!!
My friend came over and engaged in small talk for all of 5 mins. before The Question came up....'So, what can I do to help you get back to meetings?'.... She said it with a smile, so I just laughed and changed the subject... We talked for a few more mins, and then she asked the same thing again... So I told her that I was working through some things, but that it was a very personal journey and that I would appreciate her prayers. Then I changed the subject again. Believe it or not, she brought it up a third time.... !!!! I told her that I appreciated her concern, but that there was really nothing that she could do. I was trying not to look worried, but by that point I was starting to get somewhat annoyed, actually. She left it alone after that.
I would have loved to have used the depression story, but her husband and mine are both elders and talk a lot, so that one wouldn't fly. I'm sure she will go home and report to her husband, who will report to my husband.... Good grief.
Thanks so much for all the good advice!!!! Just knowing you all were here was a huge help! You guys are great.
GGG
Oh! I'm glad I caught the update before I went to work! It seems like it wasn't as bad as it could have been.
I'm relieved and off to work!
Dams
you handled it quite well i think. although curiosity is probably killing her so expect more contact.
Always leave the private meeting with the well meaning Witness with the Witness getting what they want. Make an appointment to meet up at the Sunday meeting two weeks away. Get sick Saturday night. Call at midnight and cancel. Next time call at one am . . . etc.
ALWAYS be sure they leave the private meeting with you thinking they got what they wanted, and satisfied that the meeting went good. Always set up an appointment, always cancel late at night the day before. Never forget to cancel. NEVER take a call from them late at night.
Graciously handled, GoingGoingGone.
But I am also liking Garybuss's suggestion.
